Who could have foreseen what an .....interesting.....year 2020 was for all four worlds. Robot 1 and Robot 2 discuss in detail and also make predictions for the year to come.
Thursday, December 31, 2020
Friday, December 25, 2020
Saving Christmas (again)
by Emmit Other
There is power in belief
But so few consider the consequences
Such reckless belief might make Santa and his reindeer fly
You might not even mind the Krampus
Revived by a raft of Christmas horror movies
But now the existential Christmas Dilema
Is part of the Mythology
Like Mr Magoo
Santa needs constant saving
His head stuck in a bucket
Or jail
Or kidnapped by Martians
Or trapped in an office complex during am elaborate heist of Nakatomi Plaza
Like Camelot being invaded
By every rando and his aunt matilda
Incompotent Santa needs constant help
It makes Christmas ours
Democratizing the magical distribution of presents
Though by new the sleigh smells like a used restroom in the Back of Fucking Beyond
The elves really cant get the smell out
So when you see Santa
With his neck stuck in a plastic six ring beer holder
By all means help the poor bastard out
But let him do his job
Poor man has self esteem issues
Let christmas save itself for once
Thursday, December 24, 2020
To my Beloved
by Emmit Other
The stars burn eternal
But also with envy for thee
Envoy of Kindness
Sentinel for all creatures great and small
Keeper of Lore
Organizer of Archives
Solver of Puzzles
Patroness of the Arts
Fashionista Appreciator
Fellow Traveller to Exotic and Distant Lands
We roam the Earth
But in some ways the Cursed Year was blessing
More time with thee
Glory and Amber we Made the Hourglass stopper
In thine eyes I see my best self
Merry Christmas Most Beloved
Twas the Night Before Spacegoats
We take a beloved christmas poem read by a robot and add Space Goats to key parts...because what could be more 2020 than that?
Is this really a good idea?
by Emmit Other
I see a future
A thousand thousand years from now
When we are but a myth
Our seeds are scattered to the stars
Panhuman missives zeal from one colony to another
In the blink of an eye by quantum entanglement
The line between flesh and steel blurs
And Earth is lost
Only to be found again
Earth herself
Our cradle, reduced to a rancid Venus hothouse
Our reexplorers are saddened
But their sorrow turns to horror
As the only life in the Sol system
Is a never ending cave complex
Deep beneath the surface of Mars
Bat eyed mole men
Slink and slime around
Living on roaches and spiders and centipedes
Sapient enough to know horror
But with no record of how they came to be
Leon Stink has cursed the Martians
To a million years of evolutionary horror
Just so he could die with a feather in his cap
His grinning skeleton beaming down on the ruin of his colony
Orbiting in his car with his hand on the wheel
Stellar wind in the final strand of its vacuum preserved hair
Lord of the empire of Morlock horror
That panhumanity leaves
And never visits again
Monday, December 21, 2020
Conjunction
by Emmit Other
Chronos and Zeus
Battling it out again in the heavens
800 years past
Mirage of Mythology
Panoplay to the steely naked eye
Bookending the Year of Chaos
Aquarius hosting the galactic affair
Drowned in a glory of stars
Stars we cannot see due to the pollution of light
One era ends
Another begins
The Golden Age is ours
If we but claim it
Fire was stolen once
Lets steal it again
And go up to join them
Friday, December 18, 2020
Tuesday, December 8, 2020
The Fate of the World
In the war movie "Enemy at the Gates" about dueling Snipers in Stalingrad, the fate of the world comes down to two men. In the real world, the fate of the WHOLE FREAKING WORLD comes down to two senatorial elections.
Now is not the time to sit on your ass.