Merlin is worrying in his study. Chaos enters.
Merlin
What are we going to do?
Chaos
Greetings Champion.
Merlin (stands)
Oh. Chaos! How wonderous that you have graced us with your presence.
Chaos
Is it the royal we now?
Merlin
No, I meant, um, collectively, Camelot benefits from your presence each time you visit it.
Chaos
Does it?
Merlin
Oh definitely.
Chaos
How exactly?
Merlin
Uh, well, more freedom of course, and more fun unexpected encounters.
Chaos
It is true, I am awesome and I am the source of spontaneity and luck and the unexpected. And freedom, for whatever that really means. And what have you done to help that along lately, Merlin?
Merlin
Um, come again?
Chaos
You’re my champion, right?
Merlin
Yes. Yes, of course.
Chaos
So report. How is my cause?
Merlin
I’ve…(beat) I’ve been monitoring a grave situation regarding Grenademan.
Chaos
Oh?
Merlin
Yes, he has an artifact, the Helm of Mambrino, from a previous champion of yours in a different game.
Chaos
That sounds like more chaos, not less.
Merlin
Yes, but it might be considered cheating.
Chaos
I see. And that’s it?
Merlin
Well…
Chaos
That’s the best you can do?
Merlin
I (beat) can certainly do more, that has been my plan all along.
Chaos
Excellent. Do tell me about your plan.
Merlin
I had been keeping it secret since Order’s spies are everywhere. But I assure you, much chaos will be spread.
Chaos
Fantastic. And what chaos will that be?
Merlin
Funny you should ask, I have a whole raft of chaotic things to do.
Chaos
Wonderful. Such as?
Merlin
(Beat) I will turn half the knights of Camelot into Barnyard animals.
Chaos
Bingo.
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