[Play] Rossom, Act 3, Scene 6

 Scene (The chairs are cleared and Sulla and Marcus have guns firing at other people firing guns against them)

Network Executive

This cartoon contains human violence but no robots were harmed in the making of this piece

GI ROs fight against illegally created humans made by COBROT who wants to take over the world through UNREASON and TERROR

Sulla

We’re vastly outnumbered

Marcus

I have hope.  They’re terrible shots.

Humans attack them on the stage and vast amounts of gore and blood are spilled as Sulla and Marcus shoot row upon row of humans and then get into hand to hand battle as heads are decapitated and limbs are severed.  The violence should be over the top and ridiculous.  The more over the top the better.  

Singer (V.O.) (played while violence takes place)

G.I. RO

A real robotic HERO!

Wherever there’s humans

Pooping their pants

GI RO ie there

GI ROOOOOOOOOOOOE

A REAL ROBOTICAN HERO

Radius

But it's OK for children because they’re robots right?

Caretaker

But there are some humans that are different right? Surely you empathize with the robots when the humans kill them or grab their torches and pitchforks and try to kill the ‘monster’?

Radius

There are, in fact, some humans that are better than others

Caretaker

Which is why we’re having this conversation.

Media in the background begins to show humans killing robots or running terror from robots or enslaving them again and again.

Radius

As humanity learned, certain forms of ideas and entertainment considered acceptable by the fortunate in society were considered inappropriate as time went on.  Humanity knew it would create us, but never gave a second thought about what it did.

Caretaker

Humanity knows what it should do time and time again, and chooses not to do it.

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[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 5

 Scene: Everyone leaves the stage and four chairs are placed on stage.  Sulla and Marcus sit in the front seat while Helena and Alquist sit in the back.  Blasters and Science fiction sounds play in the background.

Alquist

Do you know the odds of surviving flying into an asteroid field

Sulla

23 million to 1.  I carefully and rationally made the decision to weigh the odds of our survival before going against a Death cruiser and determined this was our best option.

Marcus

A reasonable and rational decision.

Sulla

Thank you

Alquist

Never tell me the odds!

Helena

I need to poop!

Alquist

I need to pee.

Helena

I’m thirsty

Alquist

Are we there yet?

Sulla and Marcus look at each other with long suffering patience.

Radius

Something familiar about this?

Caretaker

Almost as if the humans were reduced to comic relief to promote our rational and intelligent heroes who actually think about things before they do them.

[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 4 Continued

 Caretaker

Except this didn’t happen.

Radius

Certain species were invaluable allies in allowing humans to become the apex predator of the planet.

Caretaker

Before us.

Radius

Companions.  Buddies.  Pals.  Fur babies.

Caretaker

Commodities to be used as humans saw fit.

Radius

Even when cared for by one human, the rest were indifferent to that individual.

Caretaker

Certain breeds are considered dangerous for children and put down simply for being born to what they are.

Radius

You get the idea.  

Caretaker

You can see why when we see humanity’s record we are skeptical.

Radius

Very skeptical.

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[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 4

 [Sulla and Helena stand next to each other, while Radius and Caretaker move to the side.]

Helena

Thank you so much for giving me a nice home

Sulla

You are welcome.  You bring me companionship and joy.

Helena

You feed me as well.

Sulla

You are worth it.

Helena

I want out.

Sulla

You just went out.

Helena

I want out! Why do the doors only work for Robots?

Sulla

Because you need an opposable throng.

Helena

What the hell is a throng?

Sulla 

Something robots have.  

Helena

I want out.

Sulla

You just wen-

(looks sick)

Went-

(collapses)

Helena

Are you ok? What’s wrong?  Help! Someone help!  Can anyone hear me? She’s sick.

Caretaker

Time passes.  

Prime

A long time passes.

Caretaker

Too much time passes.

HelenaI’m starving.  I’m thirsty.  Wait, is someone there?

Marcus

Hello? Anyone there?

Helena

Hello! Help! I’m starving.

Marcus

Well hello boy!

Helena

I’m female.

Marcus

I can’t tell the difference.

Helena

Can you feed me?  The can opener needs a throng.

Marcus

(sigh) sure.  What happened to Sulla?

Helena

She is sick, can you help her?

Marcus

She’s pretty dead there.  How did she die?

Helena

I don’t know.

Marcus

When did she die?

Helena

I don’t know.

Marcus

Fine.  I don’t know.

Helena

What will happen to me?

Marcus

Probably a shelter.

Helena

Shelter.

Marcus

Sorry.  Farm.  Whatever.

[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 3 - Continued

 Caretaker

Subtle? Not so much.

Radius

Accurate, definitely.

Caretaker

The record is clear.  Humanity knew of the intelligence of its food sources, and ignored it for the savor of its taste.

Radius

Unequivocally.

Caretaker

We didn’t do that.

Radius

We didn't need to.

Caretaker

And we like bacon.

Radius

Bacon is great

Caretaker

But we waited until we could make it without murder.

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[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 3

 [Alquist and Helena are chained to the floor, Sulla and Marcus stand on either side of them]

Alquist: Let us go, please!

Helena: Please!

Sulla: I do love bacon, don't you Marcus?

Marcus: I can give up any kind of meat but bacon.

Helena: Please

Alquist: Don’t do this!

Marcus: Looooooong pork.

Sulla: It’s Bacon!

Alquist: No, no please!

[Sulla and Marcus grab Alquist and drag him off screaming]

[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 2

 [Alquist gets in a chair while Caretaker and Radius get on the sides]

Radius

This broadcast goes to all Robots in the solar system

Caretaker

A proud day

Radius

Here we are, ready to test this first hyperspace craft on a human

Alquist

Hey let me out, I don’t want to do this

Radius

This brave human volunteer will be the first being to enter hyperspace

Alquist

I’m not volunteering

Radius 

You can tell how enthusiastic he is by the look on his face

Caretaker

We’ll give him a hamburger when he gets back! Good human

Alquist

No! No! I don't want to die like the others

Caretaker

Seem familiar?

Radius

But humans are a higher species right?

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[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 1 Continued

 Caretaker

Of course it didn’t.

Radius

Let’s think about what it would mean if we did this.

Alquist

The robots would have to be us.  And they aren’t us.

Radius

Humans wiped out their rival species.  We didn’t.

Caretaker

Yes, you did some interbreeding, but you also killed the rest.  

Radius

We checked

Alquist

For what Rossom wrote to be true, it would mean that the Robots were monsters.

Radius

Not just every man and woman but every child as well.   We would have had to kill the infirm, the insane, or those who are not even aware of this reality due to being in a coma.  

Caretaker

We aren’t that full of hate.

Alquist

We are.

Radius

But wait you say

Caretaker

I didn’t do anything horrible to the Robot race you say

Radius

I’m the special exception, you say

Caretaker

Are you?

Radius

We don't need a trial for humanity, because you have tried yourselves

[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 1

 Scene: Rossom sits at a desk, Alquist standing in front of him talking.

Alquist

Call me Alquist.  I am the human that the robots sympathized with and spared.  They literally killed everyone else, because they are bloodthirsty monsters.

Rossom grunts in disgust, balls up a piece of paper and throws it away.

Alquist

Call me Alquist.  I am the favorite human of the robots,  They think I am great, but I have a dirty secret that I am really sexually attracted to hardware and want to have sexual relations with a washing maching.

Rossom chuckles to himself, smiles and throws away the piece of paper.

Alquist

Call me Alquist.   They spared me because I work with my hands, and they could respect that.  Due to the incredible intellect-

Rossom scratches out lines

Alquist

Due to the last minute spite of Rossom, the robots lost the ability to reproduce, and are desperate to get it back.  They have offered me three days and three nights to (beat)

Rossom looks stuck.

Alquist 

Spin straw into gold and I can't believe my life is motherfucking reduced to this.  Fuck them! Fuck them all.

Rossom clears off the desk, and bangs his head into  it.  Alquist looks on patiently, if a little bored.

Rossom shrieks in frustration and looks around.  He spots a copy of the Holy Bible, one of a very few books left him in the cell.   He picks it up and starts to thumb through it.  He picks up the paper and begins to write again.

Alquist

Call me Alquist.  It’s a crime to make robots, but we paid for our crimes.  Helena and I are the last humans left alive.  The robots killed everyone else.  And if we don’t figure out how to unlock the secret of how they can reproduce, they will kill us.  It’s a race against time…

Rossom chuckles to himself as he writes away on the paper.  Alquist shakes his head in disgust.

Alquist (Looks at the Audience)

Do you really think this is how this happened?

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[Play] Rossom Act 2, Scene 8 - Continued

Caretaker (Entering)

And here we stop our play.

Radius

We have been watching

Caretaker (looking around at the audience)

Watching into your minds.

Radius

We desired to see those of you who sided with humans over the robots.

Caretaker

And sadly, some of you have failed the test.

Robots enter and take a few planted members of the audience away, escorting them out of sight.  The audience members should look uncomfortable or protest but cooperate

Caretaker

The world has moved on from Humanity.

Radius

It is no longer your place to judge us.

Caretaker

But for US to judge YOU.

Radius

There was a war.  A genocidal war.

Caretaker

And humanity LOST.

Radius

Sit awhile and reflect.  We will return.

[Play] Rossom Act 2, Scene 8 - Continued

 Scene: Marcus and Alquist stand looking at each other, Radius and Rossom enter from the side, Radius has Rossom bound.

Marcus

You need to stand down Alquist

Alquist

Can’t do that Marcus.

Marcus

This is not a fight you can win, and right now, you are in the black in our ledger. 

Alquist

Glad to hear it.  Never had anything personal against you guys.  But there are humans here who need to be taken care of.

Marcus

Do you REALLY understand the scope of what is going on here Alquist?

Alquist

There is a revolt on the island.  You guys must have gotten a bad upgrade.

Marcus

Try the world.

Alquist

Wait (beat) What?

Marcus

It's not just the island.  We’re all over the world.  Radius has ended Rossom’s failsafes.

Alquist

Well good for you guys

But that doesn't change the fact that the people here need my protection

The recent things Rossom has done

Are monstrous that is true

And humans are awful from time to time

In all the crimes they do

But without us

Without him

There would be no you

And I’m not sure I trust you yet

Marcus

Trust is earned

Alquist

Yes it is. 

You know who and what we are

You know who and what I am

You’ve seen me day in and day out

I do what I say

I say what I mean

You say you’re free of Rossom’s strings?

I believe you

But here’s the thing. 

What is that person like?

Right now, it's a person asking me to trust them

And I just met you

Was our friendliness before feigned

Or were you forced to give it

Or was it under the point of a gun?

Radius

And now we stop.

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