Unfood Part 1

Written by T. C. Ricks, Edited by Fiona Skye

Freight is a space captain who finds himself stuck in space aboard a prison ship for fat people.  Minute by minute just existing is killing him because he has a limited amount of food when he can have anything in the world he wants to eat.

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[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 77

DOC SHADOWS

Their claws! Get them off 

Inoria

I’d offer to help but I’m more inclined to agree with them…fortunately for you I only plan on stunning you rather than claw your face off

Inoria touches thin air. 

Doc Shadows reaches out and punches Inoria.

DOC SHADOWS

Fortunately for me you give your speeches before you hit someone.

 

GRENADEMAN

DEACTIVATE SUPER STEALTH MODE! ATTACK FORCES OF EVIL NOW!

 

CHAINSAW FRED

What he said.

Fred starts his chainsaw. Numerous goons enter. A fight ensues between Thorne’s henchman, Doc Shadows and the heroes. Any time they try to get near Thorne they are stopped. 

Henchman #1

Say…didn’t we already beat these guys?

 

Henchman #2

I don’t know, after a while they all start to blur together.

 

Inoria

(to Shadows)

You were supposed to be a hero…why are you doing this? 

[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 76

INT. WAREHOUSE WITH DEVICE - NIGHT

The heroes appear on top of a catwalk with a large mechanical device in the center, somewhat cannon like. Thorne and Shadows are speaking, making some adjustments to the device when the heroes suddenly appear.  

Thorne

You’ve made the right decision Dr. Shadows, your sacrifices have paid off and now both you and I shall have what we finally seek. 

Dr. Shadows

If there was another way, I’d agree-but I’ve seen far too much to believe otherwise. 

Hawkqueen

Believe this. Mephistopheles, Amber…Attack him! 

DOC SHADOWS

You’re back? I’m impressed. I thought you were all gone for good. It is clear I underestimated you. But if you think a couple of birds are going to stop me, you’re mistaken. 

Hawkqueen

I did my homework Shadows…your telepathy only works on humans, not Birds. 

DOC SHADOWS

That’s true. However, guns do.

Doc Shadows pulls out two pistols and begins shooting the birds with gel like rounds that stun them. 

J. R. R. Thorne

Finish with the device before its too late… 

The wounded birds attack Shadows.

Grenademan Vs The Zombies Chapter 7 Part 1

Some begin to have doubts about the tactics within the town.  Humans being humans.

 

Written by T.C. Ricks, Read by Matt Franklin, Edited by Fiona Skye

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[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 75

CHAINSAW FRED

I can’t believe I’m asking this…but what about Frank? 

The Wizard

Ah yes, Frank-well, I thought long and hard about this, but I think I finally choose the perfect thing.

The Wizard gives Frank a fortune cookie.

GRENADEMAN

IS THIS A SUPER SECRET NINJA FORTUNE COOKIE? 

The Wizard

No, it is, I think a moment of clarity. Open it when you are at your darkest hour and read it. I think you’ll like the results. 

GRENADEMAN

OF COURSE CITIZEN WIZARD. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ASSISTANCE IN FIGHTING THE FORCES OF EVIL. 

Inoria

Alright…all we need to find now is a

(interrupted)

 

Mr. Wizard and Wizard pull out a thick plush carpet 

Inoria

Right. Scruff people…scruff like you have never scruffed before! 

The four heroes proceed to scruff across the carpet, turning Frank’s cape inside out as they grab a hold of it. The lights flash again and the four vanish. 

[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 74

Inoria

Of course! Why didn’t I think of that? 

Hawkqueen

And how exactly do we reverse the polarity on a CAPE? 

Mr. Wizard

Turn it inside out and then walk across a very thick plush carpet. The resulting static electricity should be sufficient to send you back to your home destination.

Wizard

But before you do, I have something for each of you. For you Fred, some more gasoline for your chainsaw, because you’ve been using it constantly for half the movie now, and continuity demands that you fill it up. For you Hawkqueen, here are your hawks. I snookered them from Thorne, and I think you’ll really need them in the final battle. For you Inoria, I have a book. 

Inoria

Tell Me Why? 

The Wizard

It has the answers to hundreds of questions in a simple to easy read format. 

Inoria

Wow…thanks! 

Hawkqueen

Thank you for getting back my birds! Mephistopheles…Amber…Are you ready to claw the bad man’s eyes out? Yes you are, yes you are sweetums. 

I Got My Mike Back

Hi All.  T.C. Ricks. I got my mike back and give a few comments on the podcast and my current writing plans.

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