[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 22

DUCK AVENGER

Are you referring to my erstwhile friend in the white?

GRENADEMAN

THAT IS RIGHT, FOUL PERPATRATOR OF FELONIUS FOWLNESS, I AM HERE TO FIGHT FOR TRUTH, JUSTICE, KINDNESS, HAPPINESS, NICENESS AND THE RIGHT OF THE AVERAGE CITIZEN TO ENJOY A HOT FUDGE SUNDAY, IF ANY SAID CITIZEN WANTS TO HAPPEN TO ENJOY A HOT FUDGE SUNDAY. I SHALL ACCOMPLISH THIS BY UNLEASHING THE MIGHT OF MY RIGHTEOUS GRENADES UPON YOU IN ALL THEIR HOLY FURY.

DUCK AVENGER

I’ll have you know, good sir, that this is not a chicken, but in fact a highly dangerous Red Diamond Ground Hen.

GRENADEMAN

HE LOOKS LIKE A CHICKEN TO ME.

DUCK AVENGER

Well I assure you, he is not a chicken, and you are hurting his feelings.

GRENADEMAN

OH, I DIDN’T MEAN TO HURT HIS…WAIT A MINUTE, YOU WON’T FOOL ME WITH YOUR EVIL TRICKY WAYS…BAD GUYS DON’T HAVE FEELINGS…PREPARE TO FEEL MY WRATH!

DUCK AVENGER

Right…get him boys. Let’s teach him some political correctness with extremely violent prejudice!

[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 21

SPOTTED WOOD OWL

No it is not! All of this money will go to a good cause, anonymously donated to bird sanctuaries in the lower 48 states…minus a small collectors fee for our environmentally conscious services of course.

DUCK AVENGER

Of course, saving the environment can be terribly expensive….

Duck Avenger steps up to the Bank Teller.

DUCK AVENGER

And I’ll take all the cash in that drawer.

BANK TELLER

You’ll never get away with this!

DUCK AVENGER

Yeah? And who’s going to stop me?

The front glass doors burst into shards of glass as GRENADEMAN comes charging in, wearing gaudy costume with inverted thumbtack like helmet, coupled with dozens upon dozens of brightly colored but tiny grenades dangling from all portions of his body and a bright silver cape. As he charges through the glass doors, patrons begin shrieking in pain and removing unseen shards of glass from their clothing.

GRENADEMAN

GREETINGS CITIZENS! I AM THE MIGHTY GRENADEMAN!

Grenademan strikes a dramatic pose.

GRENADEMAN

I AM HERE TO RESCUE YOU FROM THE VILE FORCES OF THE CHICKENMASTER!

Duck Avenger is shocked at first, and then shakes his head and moves over to the man in the Chicken Suit.

Precyber Chapter 48

Things move forward.

Check out this episode!

[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 20

BANK TELLER

Well, you’re at the right place to do it.

The Bank Teller takes the deposit slip.

BANK TELLER

You didn’t quite add these numbers up right.

OLD MAN

Eh? I’ll have you know I was an accountant for 25 years before I retired, and if there is one thing I know, it’s numbers.

Three figures appear at the entrance of the bank; one dressed like a Duck (DUCK AVENGER), one like a chicken but with bright red diamonds in the feathers (RED DIAMOND BACKED HEN), and the other is dressed like an owl (SPOTTED WOOD OWL).

DUCK AVENGER

Yes, I know numbers too.

Duck Avenger fires gun into the ceiling.

DUCK AVENGER

All right everyone; this is a hold up in the name of oppressed waterfowl everywhere.

Duck Avenger begins taking money and jewels from various patrons, while the other two help.

DUCK AVENGER

Now I’ll have you know that this is no common run of the mill hold up, no sir. Is it Spotted Wood Owl?

[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 19

ISAAC

Cool!

Fred Noble looks at Frank a little suspiciously.

Frank ignores him and proceeds to toss the smoke grenade at the same pile. Smoke covers a wide area. A wind picks up and blows the smoke back at everyone in the test area. They start coughing.

FRANK

Note to self-Obtain gas mask. Now testing sleep grenade.

FRED

SLEEP grenade? Is that safe?

FRANK

Perfectly. oops.

Frank accidentally drops the grenade. A large cloud covers them all and they fall asleep.

Screen goes black.

Some time later, Frank wakes up with Fred standing over him, visibly annoyed. He points to two labels on the grenades marked, "Flash" and "Explosive".

FRED

You can test those when the kids aren't around.

FRANK

Er...right.

INT. BANK - DAY

Camera shows a large bank bustling with people. There is a large vault visible in the back behind the tellers, and a lined cordon shows several people waiting. An old man, waiting in line walks up to a bank teller.

OLD MAN

I want to deposit my money.

Precyber - Chapter 47

Clarke learns of the spark for Project Hammerfell.

Check out this episode!

[Script] Tossing Grenades at Windmills - Page 18

FRED

After dinner I guess.

FRANK

Excellent.

EXT. JUNKYARD - DAY

Frank, Fred and his two sons are all wearing improvised combat armor.

ISAAC

Dad, is this stuff necessary?

FRED

Yes it is. You ready to test this stuff out Frank?

FRANK

ABSOLUTELY. I mean, absolutely. We'll start with the easiest stuff.

Frank goes down and takes a grenade from his belt and tosses it at some mannequins that are standing up. A slick puddle of liquid splatters all over the place and the mannequins fall down. The kids cheer.

FRANK

The slick grenades work.

Frank takes another grenade off of his belt and tosses it at a large pile of junk. The grenade goes off and thick green paint explodes all over the target. It glows faintly.

FRANK

Paint grenades. Check.

ISAAC

What does that do Uncle Frank?

FRANK

Aside from the fact that it looks cool, you can use it to track people who get it on them.