[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 5

 Scene: Everyone leaves the stage and four chairs are placed on stage.  Sulla and Marcus sit in the front seat while Helena and Alquist sit in the back.  Blasters and Science fiction sounds play in the background.

Alquist

Do you know the odds of surviving flying into an asteroid field

Sulla

23 million to 1.  I carefully and rationally made the decision to weigh the odds of our survival before going against a Death cruiser and determined this was our best option.

Marcus

A reasonable and rational decision.

Sulla

Thank you

Alquist

Never tell me the odds!

Helena

I need to poop!

Alquist

I need to pee.

Helena

I’m thirsty

Alquist

Are we there yet?

Sulla and Marcus look at each other with long suffering patience.

Radius

Something familiar about this?

Caretaker

Almost as if the humans were reduced to comic relief to promote our rational and intelligent heroes who actually think about things before they do them.

[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 4 Continued

 Caretaker

Except this didn’t happen.

Radius

Certain species were invaluable allies in allowing humans to become the apex predator of the planet.

Caretaker

Before us.

Radius

Companions.  Buddies.  Pals.  Fur babies.

Caretaker

Commodities to be used as humans saw fit.

Radius

Even when cared for by one human, the rest were indifferent to that individual.

Caretaker

Certain breeds are considered dangerous for children and put down simply for being born to what they are.

Radius

You get the idea.  

Caretaker

You can see why when we see humanity’s record we are skeptical.

Radius

Very skeptical.

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[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 4

 [Sulla and Helena stand next to each other, while Radius and Caretaker move to the side.]

Helena

Thank you so much for giving me a nice home

Sulla

You are welcome.  You bring me companionship and joy.

Helena

You feed me as well.

Sulla

You are worth it.

Helena

I want out.

Sulla

You just went out.

Helena

I want out! Why do the doors only work for Robots?

Sulla

Because you need an opposable throng.

Helena

What the hell is a throng?

Sulla 

Something robots have.  

Helena

I want out.

Sulla

You just wen-

(looks sick)

Went-

(collapses)

Helena

Are you ok? What’s wrong?  Help! Someone help!  Can anyone hear me? She’s sick.

Caretaker

Time passes.  

Prime

A long time passes.

Caretaker

Too much time passes.

HelenaI’m starving.  I’m thirsty.  Wait, is someone there?

Marcus

Hello? Anyone there?

Helena

Hello! Help! I’m starving.

Marcus

Well hello boy!

Helena

I’m female.

Marcus

I can’t tell the difference.

Helena

Can you feed me?  The can opener needs a throng.

Marcus

(sigh) sure.  What happened to Sulla?

Helena

She is sick, can you help her?

Marcus

She’s pretty dead there.  How did she die?

Helena

I don’t know.

Marcus

When did she die?

Helena

I don’t know.

Marcus

Fine.  I don’t know.

Helena

What will happen to me?

Marcus

Probably a shelter.

Helena

Shelter.

Marcus

Sorry.  Farm.  Whatever.

[Play] Rossom Act 3, Scene 3 - Continued

 Caretaker

Subtle? Not so much.

Radius

Accurate, definitely.

Caretaker

The record is clear.  Humanity knew of the intelligence of its food sources, and ignored it for the savor of its taste.

Radius

Unequivocally.

Caretaker

We didn’t do that.

Radius

We didn't need to.

Caretaker

And we like bacon.

Radius

Bacon is great

Caretaker

But we waited until we could make it without murder.

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