Wednesday, December 27, 2023


"I have just beem informed that that asshole  Rhombus Ticks has beem plaguarizing mot work on Poetizer...minsult him as often as possible." Emmit Other

"I have just been informed that asshole, Emmit Other has been plagaurizing my work on Pietizer.  Insult me as often as Possible." Rhombus Ticks

Monday, December 25, 2023

[Poem] Bleep Christmas

We live in a time of too much bleep
And we wake this morining and unwrap our bleep
Despite the raging bleep
I choke down some bleep and bleep it away.
So I stumble downstairs for some eggnog
And add the special bleep sauce
And the bleep finally goes away too
Then I look at my terrified families eyes
As they saw me dreal with the bleep and the bleep
"Well enjoy the bleep show you bleeping vleeps!"

Saturday, December 23, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - The End

Someone thought a Banana Peel

On the roof





















The smell didnt really take 

Until April Fools

Thanks to Christmas Magic

They found a dead collocated Santa

In Over a Million Homes










[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - The Horn of Christmas Valere

Ghosts of Christmas Present

Live during the day

They start out vibrant and healthful

And end up salt and pepper Gray

One day is all they get

Spending their whole magic to induce Christmas wonder

They die content

Their essence spent

Then their being is torn Christmas Asunder

So I sent the Far Knight

On quite the Quest

As far and as wide as the Blue Rook Could Go

To Find The Horn of Christmas Valere

And bring it to Terra to Blow

Like the Wheel of Time

It summons the dead

But it brings not the Heroes of the Horn

Instead my friends

It allows Christmas Amends

From the Christmas Ghosts that had been Torn

Now on Christmas Eve Eve

They have a rock tockin good time

To counter the grouches of Festivus

I love that grouch day

But today Good Cheer is the way

In a mass joygasm Christmas jam most sublime.

Friday, December 22, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Liminal Christmas

Christmas is now

Christmas is now

Christmas is now

The Family Guy episode

Where he slams the door

On the modern Mary and Joseph is all true

Be generous

Be kind

Be courageous

Now is the time

Now is always the time

To wake up

And be better.

In the ancient past

Perceiving spiritual beings was the first skill we learned

Channeling was the second

The play's the thing

The Greeks were not the only culture

To believe in the sacred fury of this ritual

Actors channel the spirit of that which they become

Gods or otherwise

Let us channel Christmas all our lives

The spirit of intelligent pragmatic courageous generosity

Feel the Christmas Force flow within you

It binds all Christmas things together

It both guides your actions

And responds to your commands

Be one with the Tinsel.

Christmas is now.

Christmas is living.

Christmas is Loving.

Every culture and tradition

Has some kind of holiday this time of year.

Be kind.



Thats Blockbuster

Be kind.

Just do it.


Be all that you can be.


Be kind.

Dont be a fucking jerk.

Thats it.

Be kind.

Thursday, December 21, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Christmas Future Tense

What does the Ghost of Christmas Future fear?

As we drift into the corridors of possible tomorrows

We see empty hallways of silent doom

Whole wings and branches of Humanity's future lie silent

For a being who stretches into every possible future


Every possible future Christmas

There are thousands upon millions

More every day

Of silent Christmases

You cannot Scrooge the Dead

You cannot give more chances

When there are no more Christmases to give

No spirit is all powerful

No matter what the religious say

Every supernatural being has rules that limit them

Without exception

And to terrify and redeem

There must be some redemption to be had

And the Drunk Conductors of Humanity

Want to either decrease the surplus population

With sex clones and robot Butlers

Or increase the population until we are kept Rabbits

But this is Christmas

So we hired Diego Del Fuego's Time Traveling Mariachi Band

To show up once a Christmas in every possible future

Throwing a Christmas Party for the poor dude

Any lingering supernatural beings are invited

Flickering out like stars in the sky

As even the ghosts fade and move on

And the uplifted bears and raccoons cant sustain belief

In worlds where heat death kills everything 

Except Cockroaches Bacteria and Self Breeding Twinkies

So for a few thousand years its a Christmas Jamboree

Gods and Fairies and Santa do egg nog

With the Easter Bunny and Skeleton Jack

But eventually

Its just the Ghost of Christmas Future and Death

And of course Emmit Other

Making Morbid Poems

Until eventually 

Its just Death and an empty tear stained robe

No one left to Scrooge

No one left

Except Death

Who turns the lights out 

Until the Cockroach Men and Ant Men War

Millions of Years Later  

Wednesday, December 20, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Elfloaf

Nice Elf You have there.

Nice Meatloaf you have there.

Two birds.

One stone.

Snitches get stitches.

Tuesday, December 19, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Christmas Looking Glass

Through the looking glass

Christmas is Yellow and Purple

And everyone gives presents to Santa

The more you give

The more you get

Give a toy

Get a toy

Give an eye

Get a third eye

Give your brother

Get a sister

Elves come from somewhere after all

Santa was a gingerbread man

With all the souls he consumed

So jolly and huge

The hatter and the hare and the Cheshire Cat

All avoid him like the plague

Monday, December 18, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Mupplet Chrismas

December 11 1992

Was the day a Muppet Christmas Carol premiered

A work of wonder care and compassion

But it was more than that

Jim Henson is and was the personification

Of everything Dickens enshrined in A Christmas Carol

Kind  wise and shrewd 

He lived every day of his life as if it were Christmas

But on mAy 16, 1990

That candle was snuffed early and tragically

Many felt that it was the end of the Muppets

Disney had bought them

But it was always with the intent Jim keep on

Brian Henson picked up the torch

And voiced the small green Frog

This movie is proof that Henson's dream lived on

Characters that have lived and loved since

The single most touching moment

In one of the most touching movies of all time

Is when Kermit and Tiny Tim

Scat together with Tim on his shoulder

Walking home the first time

And you see 

What Brian and his father had.

This movie is Christmas

In more ways than one.

Sunday, December 17, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Ed Who

You didn't see it in the book

You didn't see it in the movie

Not even the video game

(Please dont ask)

But one Who was  not smiling 

When he changed bis ways

Made one who was watching

For the rest of their days

For any backsliding

Any at all

And then Edward Who

Would be there for their fall

You see for Ed that Christmas

Was not about something more

But a train you bought at the store

The Markleblat 9000 was shiny and neat

With every accessory it ran twenty feet

Ed knew what that green meanie had done

So when it was legal he purchased  a gun

The cheapest place beyond  the North pole

And Ed didnt care for nice or for coal

He waited at night by bis chimney patrol

Waiting to blow the Grinch away

When the Green ex Grouch passed

(For non but Elves and Robots last)

He stood over the ground an extra six days

Just to make sure he stayed that way

Then at last at last at last

He played with his trains in peace.

The lesson my friend is as simple at this

Learn to forgive or goodbye your life kiss.

Merry Christmas to All

And to all a good night

In spite of this poem

And verbal word blight.

Saturday, December 16, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Did He Really

Jingle Bells

Batman Smells

Batmobile List a wheel

And Joker Got Away

.....Did he?

Did he really?

Or was this all a choreographed plan

So he could find Santa

Get the Magic Bag back

Cut Santa Loose

Ignore Santa's disturbing tent

Vanish into the shadows

Watch the Joker doing bis Christmas Special

Emerge from the shadows right behind him

Cut to technical difficulty

And put the Joker

Back in the Arkham Deck

Where he belongs

Merry Christmas Gotham

Friday, December 15, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Into the Potterverse

The darkest of timelines didnt stay that way

When Clarence thr Angel broke things apart

A work without George Bailey would break your heart

But a world doesnt stop just because the movie does

And this one shit town became a celebrity cause

The Donny Dont for The US of America

The inspiration for a better Colombia

Everything Potter did was made illegal

Capitalism chained by presidential seal

Sometimes bad things happen for good

But that doesnt mean it ever should.

Thursday, December 14, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Christmas Cocks

Chris Cocks is the CEO of Hasbro

And lives up to his name

Every year the retailer prepares for Christmas

Foie Geasing with Christmas Decorations and Christmas cheer

A fat dumb happy consumer they can plug

The proverbial Christmas goose

But like every gross filth nillionare

Christmas Cocks has killed the goose that laid the golden egg

Reaganizing the economy Black Rock style

Until there is no more gold to give

But still they try

Fracking our pickets with digitized microtsrgetsd ads

A synchronized panorama of stories 

Lazy workers, Quiet Quitting and Covidflation

When it has always been filth nillionares with their hands in our pockets

They take but they do not give

That is a parasitic relationship

There is no nobles oblige with the new robber barons

There is no symbiosis

They lay people off during the very holiday 

During the very height of cheer they hope to exploit

Christmas Cocks already tried to steal my Inglemia

Christmas Cocks tries to ruin the Dnd Ecosphere

Now Christmas Cocks the Cock walks the walk

And joins Amazon and Spotify 

Sipping bitter employee tears in a champaign flute

If you spend money on Amazon or Spotify or Hasbro this year

Especially after you read this

You sre raising a toast in Christmas Cocks' Cock party

Sipping tears and urinating on Santa

Drink up buttercup




Grab a pitchfork and torch

Come and Follow Me.

And kill the Beast of Capitalism.

Wednesday, December 13, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Satanic Iowa

Somewhere deep down in the Cornhole State

Whose capital city is Ohio or Colombia or I forget

Where they wont vote for you 

Unless you have a Butter Popsicle or Pork Chop on a stick

(Originally invented to get the dog to play with Ugly Tim)

There is in the real honest to goodness world

A legit wide eyed janitor

Power cleaning the floor with Christmas Carols blaring

Over the State Capital PA

At 3am in the morning

Where he drops bis mop

And stares at the human skull and candles

Put there by the Satanic Temple

Because Christian Nationalists 

Just had to put religious shit 

On the Public Square

These heroes of secularism and satan

Do more to save use from Cnazis than Taylor Swift

So when you drink your eggnog

Raise your glass 

To the poor janitor

Who just sighed

Shook his head

And moved on

Tuesday, December 12, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Santa's Blavk Bag [nsfw]

There is naughty

And then there is naughty in a good way

Santa has many bags

Contrary to popular belief

But the black bag in the hidden vault

Is saved for the very special toys

For very special boys and girls

All of which are tested

Year round first on Mrs Clause

And then a veritable elf harem

Where Santa's Little Helper 

Is helped to get gallons and gallons

Of special Christmas frosting

After the normal journey is through

The rubberized reindeer

And the stealth sleigh 

Travel the world

Giving magical sex toys

To those who deserve them

Stopping occasionally

For the right party

That has a lot more to offer Santa

Than milk and cookies

Dont write an x rated lette via USPS

Write it in the dongeon

And give it to your Dungeon Master

And I dont mean

Fireball does 6d6 

If you get

What I mean

Monday, December 11, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Sugar Ants

Ants kove sugar, OK?

Thats a given but for ecologies to work

Something has to fill vital and oft overlooked rolls

What happens to tru ks dropped in the Candy Cane forest?

Sugar ants

Ants made of sugar and covered in chocolate

They consume sugar

And are  a natural pest in the Elf world

When they swarm whole crops can be lost

Only consumed by the ant eating Penguin

Found only in The North Poll

Bred specifically from South pole stock

They will fuck up your picnic


Sunday, December 10, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Elf Street Knife Fight

Suburbia is what many consider normal

Leave it to Beaver Andy Griffith Audry from Little Shop of Horrors

Civilization Six has the Chutzpah to call

The Neighborhood an Advancement of Civilization

Rather than a Blight and Carbon Killer

But for good or ill

Its most peoples definition



Every year Emerald Oaks had a conflict of kitschy

A rumble of the remedial

Where everyone tried to cover ever square foot of their yard

With inflatable Christmas vomit

Keeping up with the Joneses

At night it was undeniably pretty in the electric wonderland

By day it was the Vomitorium of Used Car Dealerships

Cars drove up in huge numbers to see the homes

Carbon slowly killing those fucking elves

Who didnt give me that toy I wanted last year

Die elves die


Until now Old Man Withers had kept to his house

Lights off shades drawn

Not so much Grinch as Misanthrope

But two things changed in 2023

One, Bob Cratcheti, had an easement on his property by an inch

Two  he had to stop taking his meds for his heart

So Mr Withers had a tendency to....

 Take things to extremes

The night before the final day of contest judgement

While everyone else was asleep

He drove a wrecking ball

And destroyed his house

And used his years as a contractor

With some help from some friends

Reading the fine print of the rules in the HOA

The only way to have more Kitsch per square foot

Was to add more to the yard

So his five million dollar home

Was replaced by a Tiny Home

And the rest was the International Clearance Yard of Crap

 He had to redo the electrical junction six times

Planes informed the local airport of the navigation hazard

Santa had to put on sunglasses and nearly crashed

(that fucker....)

Mr Withers Won

And then had his house foreclosed by the HOA

For fine after fine after fine

But he was just fine with that

Because he smashed that damn trophy

Carried from year to year

And sent pieces baked into meatloaf

For all his former neighboors

And sailed into the sunset

Until he got eaten by sharks nine years later

The sharks found him gamey and bitter

Very very bitter.

Saturday, December 9, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Family Ties

Before the pernicious family killer

That was Zuckerfuck Fuckbook

People still found analog ways for family feuds

They still found Christmas

The best time of the year to come together

And invent reasons to hate each other

Oh yes

The magick of Christmas laquers and liquors this friction

But it also super turbines it

I have seen parents rift children

And siblings split in twain

All for some tinsel

And some religious bigots refrain

Heed my warning ye who harken

This a time of year

Where blood can spill with loved ones

More than merry cheer

Take herd my friend

And remember who you love

Else your next Christmas may be alone

Your hopes snuffed out by an assassin's leather glove

Friday, December 8, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Honorable Ancestors

Do you really think it a coincidence

That the story that started it all

Involved Christmas ghosts?

Before Christmas, before Mithras, before Saturnalia

We saw the stars and marked them

With no mote than sticks and caves and fire

They could still count the days

Notch them and mark them

And celebrate and fear the darkest night

Before all Hallows eve

There was the Darkest Night

And the great unknown of those we only knew

In Song and Story

All the way back

To Mitochondrial Eve

We are all on family

One blood

One tiny world in an infinity of space trapped light

Reach out 

And touch the cheek of those who came

And know you will join them soon enough

Eat Drink and Be Merry

For The Ghost of Christmas Future comes for all

And be remembered for what you have done

Not what might have been

Not what might have been

Thursday, December 7, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Bus Full of Orphans


Pericuolo Narr turned into a human

And saw a bus full of Orphans

That was surrounded on four sides

Dangling on the bridge pinned in

By men with mirrorshades and machine guns

And four plucky idiots with slingshots

Who were holding their own

Six x of the guys with mirror shades

Were acting like  they were on LSD

It was Christmas Eve

Where the fuck were the cops?

It was a slow attention

One of the kids was wounded

In swoops Peri

Obfuscated lile the City Gangrel he is

And he bites one of the mirror shades

And coleslaws two more with celerity

They aim their fire at him

And he turns to mist and obfuscated

They are looking outward now not inward

Peri bides his time

While the mirror shades panic

And the kids use more LSD

Peri attacks again and again

Eventually Peti thinks the coos are coming

Only for a helicopter full of Iteration X cyborgs to swoop in


Then Peri remembers its fucking Christmas Eve

Santa owes him a favor

Peti makes a call

The cyborgs see him 

And can shoot the mist with incendiary rounds


And he thinks its over

Only like a fucking comet

The mage changeling swoops down from the sky

And a pillar of sunlight

Turns the cyborgs to lightning slag

And strangely doesnt burn him

The mirrorshades flee

And the kids 

Changelings all 

Are talen somewhere safe


To his eternal amusement is owed another favor 

Turns out there was an arch duke on the bus

A nine year old arch duke


Eye toll

Wednesday, December 6, 2023

[Poem] Dead White Horse Redux

 by Emmit Other

Came a wind and a whisper

Any prophet worth his salt

Would know the time was now

The constitution hung by a thread

The Republicans wer in disarray

The Prophet of the Latter Day saints could have raised his hand

And told the LDS members of the GOP caucus

To side with the Democrats

Save Ukraine

Same America

Change parties


They didnt

Not the Prophet

Not Mitt Romney

Not any Romney

Not a one

A family more tied to the political destiny of this nation

Than any other LDS family in history

And not one has saved this country

Not even close

Nor saved the constitution

Not even close


I hear tell

That the church paid money to a woman

To keep quiet about sexual harassment

You can buy anything in this world

With money

Ask a Saint

Ask any saint

They will tell you

You can buy anything in Satan's world with money

The church sure took that to heart

So heed this prophesy 

And heed it well

For it shall come to pass

No matter which way the winds blow

And the saints shall learn

That those with whom they ally themselves

Those of the Right

Those of the Reich

Those of the Rally

Are not their allies

And that they wish them harm

And that of the saints that serve Maga

Half are loyal to the Prophet

And Half are Loyal to Maga

And when the moment of mistruth comes

And the LDS Prophet does steer the saints

Even a molecule to the left

Blood shall flow

And one saint shall slay another

And neither side shall win

For both are losers

And already lost

And already lost


[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Festivus

It started as a joke

About an aluminum pole

And then they took that pole

And jammed it the gullet

Of the Tree Virus

That saw Christmas decorations on Labor Day

That saw religious entitled nazis

Think that everyone had to worship as they do

Like silver to werewolves

Aluminum has  become the cross to war Christmas Monsters

It sears their flesh and makes them cringe

It forces them to see the doublethink

That lets them believe in a God wbo is Mercy

Whilst worshipping an Orange Turd Bucket

Its a long month

Very long for those who are offended by religion in general

This oasis of fun in Vomit Green and Blood Red

Is a welcome respite from the storm

Tuesday, December 5, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Christmas Engine

You know that this holiday is more than the misplace birthday

Of the Dessert Messiah


When you continue to celebrate

An appropriated pagan holiday

For centuries

It seeps into the DNA of your story

And the Thane of Christmas Lore is born

Feudal Vassal to the Architect of Stories

He is both the ultimate sage on what is

Or isnt

A christmas story

He is the predelictated master of every tale thereof

An endless field in swaying grass

Of every perfect snowflake in hoary frosted fields

Sings around a tinsel wrapped tower 

That seems to blot out the sun for its shiny immense height

He sits there on a throne

Telling tales for fascinated pilgrims from dawn to dusk

A library of every christmas tale

Pest Present or Future

Galls every nook and cranny of these hallowed minty halls

The miasma of mistletoe holly and poinsettia

Waft the nostrils and symphony the senses

He sits on his Candy Cane throne and speaks

Of Christmas miracles in this 

Or any other reality

Understanding the mix of nightmare and beauty

Of sadness and joy

Of banality and miracle

His is a power to be reckoned with

As his demense belies his own

Everywhere the Christmas lights may glow

Electric Fire or Otherwise

Stay a while

Grab a cup of hot cocoa

And Listen

Monday, December 4, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - July

Hooah! This aint no nightmare rookie

This is cold hard stabulality knifing you in the eye

People who say the American Empire is dying

Didnt see our troops mounting Operation Foui Gras 

Where we infiltrated that Valley of Holiday Doors

And gave santa a much needed Guantanamo

The boys of Wall Street finally caught on

To this free toys nonsense

And we are establishing a good old fashioned Hollyberry Republic (instead of Banana)

With a corporate constitution

Good little boys and girls can get toys

By getting a Prime Subscription 

Like everyone else

Meanwhile the coal isnt being wasted on naughty girls and boys

Redirected to Manchin's West Virginia power plants

Deck the halls with the US flag

Because The North Pole is now

A non voting observer at the United Nations

Sunday, December 3, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Carol [nsfw]

She loved a man

She knew qas too good for her

And every day pined from afar

And one day could take it no more

Amd cried alne by herself at a diner

A nice man who called himself Magnar

Listen to her problems

And then said such nice calm things

And she relaxed

And she focused

And she was a good girl

And smiled

And giggled

And went for a little nap

And Mistletoe came out to play

She was a girl who knew her worth

And hot hot she was 

And how sexy she was

And she had a week to prove her point

So she went shopping

And went into work that day

And every eye in the place

Wanted to fucked her 

Or to be her

And the man of her dreams

Finally began to pay attention

But the problem was

Now that she knew her own worth

He just wasnt that interesting any more


But she didnt want to leave Carol out on the cold

She proved to her just how good a girl she could he

When Carol woke up

She found put a few things

An entire wardrobe of clothes

Paid for by men who would do anything for her

If she told them what yo do

And tied them up 

And made them feel special

Including the boy who desperately wanted her

On a waiting list for her services

Carol was horrified at first

But her fingers slid slowly down


Her legs

She found

She lind of liked it

A lot.

Saturday, December 2, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Snowbell

People think cats are indifferent to their humans

But its a careful lie

They dont want us getting too arrogant

They dimply teach us what they perceive as divine eisdom

So when Snowbell

Got scared at the gas station

And ran out

The family was 500 miles away

Before panic set in

Snowbell was invisible in the snow

And cold

And terrified

Looking for her family

A week passed

And she was placed in a shelter

The clock was ticking

All seemed lost

When a bat came through the skylight

And talked to them

Every single one got a home

Snowbell was last

The hardest to find

And late on Christmas eve

A doorbell was rung

And as the snow fell

A grateful family embraced

 their long lost owner 

Only Snowbell heard the flapping of batwings

And reindeer hooves

Up in the sky

Up in the deep whir sky

Friday, December 1, 2023

[Poem] The First God of Christmas

by Emmit Other

The God of Christmas
Isnt Who You think
Amd every present 
That you wrap
Gives him a sippy drink
Who you ask?
Quite a simple task
Old ringed Saturn
God of Time
Takes your spirit most sublime
And sips it in like fine fine wine
So go be merry
Get to work
Insane shopping 
So he takes a schlurk
Oh so jolly
The saint that aint
Giveth presents
Like a thing that aint
Eyes aglow
Inside the fire
Milk and Cookies 
His hungry desire
Takes your offering
And leaves a present
You think you gave it
Isnt that pleasant
No burden of worship
The rest of the year
You steal his holiday
He steals right back and wont shed a tear.

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Slarg's Christmas Wish

The nicest werewolf

With a  rage of 10 you ever met

Too stupid to be mean

This Ahroun Shadowlord stereotype

Thinks it is a genetically modified dog

Who works for Jeebers Mcjosephat 

The second most powerful vampire in Oklahoma

Templated personality wise

More on the Tasmanian Devil 

Than perfect hair at Trader Vik's

He found the taste of elves

To minty fresh

4 out of 5 dentists who chew screaming elves

Recommend Dentine to clean out the gums

Merry Christmas Slarg

Merry Christmas

Thursday, November 30, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Pericuolo Narr

An anarch vampire turned just prior to the Treaty of Thorns

He fought with the underdog and against Empire

Against small evil for centuries

Always on the side of Liberty

He spotted a zip tied Santa 

And cut him free with a rip of Gangrel claws

But they still had Santas magic bag

Distributing bags of blood

To all the naughty Sabbat vampires

So he took this new fangled Hot Air Balloon

And poured gallons of whale oil on the barn

And lit the  match

And enjoyed a nice toasty Christmas bonfire

While a horrified Santa looks on

Peri always got to pick on house 

That Santa visited every Christmas without fail

Worthy or not, believing or not

So far he has 'Saved Christmas' 237 times

And he intende

To do it 237 more.

Wednesday, November 29, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Gimpl Santa

If a magical being is affected by our portrayal

Like statues making Zeus

Then think of the number of times

Santa has been kidnapped


Zip Tied

Hey baby

He likes it

Hes into that

Every December 26th

He gets down With Mrs Clause

In a Rabbet Suit

The eleves all join in

Tuesday, November 28, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Out Of Their League

The League of Christmas Darkness were evil but not bad

So when they saw the North Pole sink 

They hung their heads in sad

With no Santa  there was no ritual to steal

With all drowned elves

Some monsters had no meal

Sure they could survive

But  they defined themselves with Christmas

And while genuinely good people

Were still good

The lack of magic without Drowned Santa

Was random and rare

And so Mirror Universe Santa, and Krampus 

And all the other Christmas Villains

Began to believe presents again

Coopted by the Holiday 

That Would Not Stop

Could Not Be Stopped






Monday, November 27, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Borealisg

The Northern Lights inspires

But she is eternally alone

She lights the sky

And brings hope to those in the Long Winter Night

She cannot see her peer

Far far to the south

But she can hear her

They sing at night

Songs only the stars can hear

Until fon one night

A magic spell

Let them embrace in each others arms

Two dancing lovers

Kissing and twirling in the snow

Together at last

Sunday, November 26, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Happy Birthday Jesus

Once upon a time

There was a sweet nigh perfect boy

Born in Bethlehem

Raised in Galilee

Smart, bright and beloved by all

There are those who say 

There is no historical record 

Of Jesus of Nazareth


They are liars


Did this young man have magical powers?

Was he literally a God made Flesh?

Who knows

He was

Per extensive research and the actual bible

Born in April

But Rome put it in Mithras

To make the new state Christian Religion

More Popular

No matter what you believe

About his divinity

Or the synchronicity between gospels

His message is clear

'This I have told you

Love one another'


It is kind hilarious

That the Axis of Fascism

Gave plans

Leaked by Trump

To Theocratic Fascists

To Attack Theocratic Totalitarian Imperialists

(I cant call Israel Fascist

Because Fascism requires a cult of personality

And Bibi has none)

To empower Russia

To divide the west

And starve funds

From Ukraine

Weakening Democracy Everywhere

Sounds like a crap plan

But its working

And working well

As we see

In Argentina

In Poland

In The Netherlands

In the Toilet Bowl US House

So this Holy Land

Is awash in blood

Splattered by Bombs

Made by America

For Israel

To Drop On 2.2 million people

Most of whom are under 18

That a plurality approaching majority

In Israel Dont Consider Human

Because Aipac

Because Larry Summers

Because Putin

'This I have taught you

To love one another'

Aint no love

Like that 

Of the fruits

Not known by Christ

But who fake cast Demons Out

In His Name

Saturday, November 25, 2023

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Christmas Appropriation

Milo Mindbender In A Santa Hat

Dry humping A Zip Tied Ball Gagged Krampus

Smacking His Lips On Santa Jerky

Flicking A Platinum Coin

At Tiny Tiny Tim In a Hamster Wheel

To Power The  Organ of Shrieks

From Three Bound Ghosts of Christmas Past Present and Future

To his Demented Musical Delight  

Sits Back on a Genuine Leather Arm Chair Made

Of Dasher Leather

Sipping Hot Cocoa Laced With the Rare Imported Grinch Blood

While Max Looks Out the Window with Sad Wide Eyes

The House Always Wins

And its Good To Be The King.

Friday, November 24, 2023

[Poem] The 31 Carols of Christmas - Dickens

Christmas existed before Christmas

Saturnalia and Mithras

Christmas existed before what we conceive of 

As Christmas

A holiday that celebrated the birth

of The Desert Messiah




The mythology of a better world

A world where Samsurra or Satan 

Or the tyranny of the Demon Deceiver

Wrapped us up in our personal hells

That the mirage of banality the Skeptic bane

Made to only fantasize  that we could escape to a simulation

A world where 

Even only for a month

The promise of the New Testament

Of The Beatitudes

Of a Better World

Were True


In Some ways


Christmas Is Real 

The Man Who Invented Christmas

Is Real

The Grinch Who Stole Christmas

Is Real


Im His Story of Three Ghosts scolding a Capitalist

For BEING a good Capitalist

And he listens

And actually gives a shit about humanity

That part sadly

Is most definitely fiction

And capitalists have been Capitalizing on Christmas

Ever since

But the spirit of the thing

A better world

It is real

Love it or hate it

Everyone in the world is touched by it

Every religion has created or adjusted their holidays

To capture or mirror that feeling

That very real magic

The Nightmare Before Christmas Skeleton Jack

Where we all laboratory our Tinsel

Boiling Toiling the Wonder

Of How



Do we make it real


No Invisible Power can enslave us

If we dont have enough people willing to be assholes

To each other

Why cant every day be Christmas?

It can

I believe


It will

Dickens saw it first

We literally just have to believe


I do

Emphasis on







Wednesday, November 22, 2023

[Poem] Developer User Interface

Few professions

Are as wonderful

Or as Stupid 

As the Developer

Give them a lever large enough

And they will move the world

Give them a problem

and they are the ultimae wizards of 


But for What Why When

Or Gods Help Us All


They are Circus Clowns

Every stupid button

Every annoying slider

Or garbage crap

If it wasnt enshittification for money

It was an idiot developer

Trying to automated something

They shouldnt


Due to Hubris

Or Laziness

Saturday, October 28, 2023

[Poem] Poem of the Third

This one is gonna be weird

Not gonna share it

So if the weird or disturbing stuff

Sets you on edge

Or makes you feel

Like you are chewing tinfoil

This is one to skip 

Gentle reader


And he spoke to them in Parables

Because he did not want to be deplatformed

Go read the Parable of the Ten Talents

In the Bible

I will wait


That guy

Went and used his 1000 talents of gold

(Side fact ladies and gents

A talent is kinma close to 66 pounds

Or 1.5 million dollars

So the king 

Made him a fucking nillionare)

And made himself 

A science comoany

(I warned you this gets weird)

And performed a Human Centipede style experiment

And grafted the head of the King onto his son

While they were both alive and screaming

The nillionare Gold Guy (we will just call him the nillionare now)

Then took the second talent guy

And stole all his talents

And scattered him to the four corners of the Earth

And then he cloned

The king/prince again and again

Rebooting his memory

Like that movie The Island

And still paraded clones

Of the King Monster around

Until some rando showed up

And claimed that All Gold Guys stuff

Belong to him

And sporked Gold Guy

And they Sporked each other 

While the clones crawled back to the lab

And tried to put Humpty Dumpty 

Back Together Again

And the Prince was OK

And slightly normal

But he was the Prince

Not the king

Amd then the army of clone kings

(Army of Kangs?)

Went nuts

And randomly distributed gold


And then said second talent guy

And his descendants

Got the kingdom for a while

And then Batman showed up



Yeah this isnt a good story

Its just an accurate one

If you know what is going on

Which you dont want to

Trust me

Why are you reading this again?

Anyway Batman goes and finds...



And superman looks at the Army of Mad Kinds

And rounds em all up

And puts em in Arkham

But some kings are mean

And some are  evil fucking Jokers

And this one king that gave the kingdom back

To second talent guy

Along with several other kings

Were evaluated by Superman

To see if they could be rehabilitated or not


Remember that obscure Bat Villain

The Ventriloquist?

Who had a dummy that killed people

But 'forgot' what the Dummy did

Why the fuck are you still here?

Anyway the Ventriloquist was really really fucking suprised

To be in the same category as Joker and Riddler

And a bunch of Kangs

But there he was

And he was not there

To keep Gotham PD

From taking Gotham

Back for the original owners

Turns out

The gold the king gave

Wasnt his to give in the first place






See if I dont

Friday, October 27, 2023

[Poem] The Bad Space

bu Emmit Other

On Mastodon

The Only Major Social Media

Free of Algoaddictive Crap

There is a fascinating struggle

From a Welsh Pixie TERF(D) 

Who built her a trap

She forged an alliance w a Narcissist

Named Ro The Arrogant Twat

He is Black and Bisexual

A fact for a second he never lets be forgot

Few months ago a rando

Made an account called the Goodspace to show

That half of their blocklist was anti LGBT

And it was led by a bigot named Ro

Ro has a patreon 

Where he earns thousands of dollars for this

So he rallied bis bigot black friends

And accused the accusers of this

Anyone who challenges their bigotry

Is a racist a pedo and more

He will not surrender his block list

He even expanded it more

But Mastodon is a Federation

It just moved around him in spaced

Despite Daily Sock puppets and patsies

His blocklist has been quite outpaced

Though Welsh Pixie is quite rotten

I have confidence she and Ro's antics

Will soon be all quite forgotten

The lesson here 

Is perfectly clear

Dont bet on the underdog

When the Underdog bite the hand that feeds it.

Poems of Gods


by Emmit Other 

Can you see it?

Can you hear it?

The skies shake

To an electric guitar

As renegade gods

Kick against the pricks

Refusing to answer

For being fucking dicks

They broke their word

And now there's a trial

King Kong of spirit Power

Is in fucking self denial

I took you at your value

I took you at your word

To think that I wont hold you to it

Is fucking stupidly absurd

So I found a bigger gorilla

Now you can sit down

And take your medicine

You fucking Goddy  tawdy clown

While someone who is bigger

Washes your lying mouth with soap

Keep up your games in my life

As I give you room to hang yourself

Here take mote fucking rope

The Trial Begins

by Emmit Other

The Angels of the God of Gods

Swing around the trial venue

The least charge first

Those who kept their word

Made honest mistakes

Until those who lied

And made false promises

They never intended to keep

Because they thought 

Nothing was bigger

Or more powerful than them

They were all wrong


Every single shard

Of the Broken Desert God




Republican One

At the height of their power

At the nadir of their joy

A monster on the Soeaker's chair

A miracle occurs





Because their God

Is in unbreakable chains


Just like hos satanic

Orange David.

Wednesday, October 25, 2023

KOSA and Drunk Senator Markey and Drunk Senator Warren

The Kids Online Safety Act is a Bipartisan Bill meant to "Protect the Children" "For the Children" and to stick it to "Big Tech" (which I made a series about called The Sins of Silicon Valley) but this wont protect kids and will help nazis hurt LGBT kids and help nazis track teens seeking abortion.  Drunk Senator Warren and Drunk Senator Markey and 18 of their 'liberal' and 'progressive' collegues in the Senate don't care.  They must be primaries.

Check out this episode!

Wednesday, October 18, 2023

Eagle as Phoenix - Preamble

Preamble of a New Constitution; what a Preamble is and why we need one

Check out this episode!

Friday, October 6, 2023

[Poem] The Old Carriage House

House of shadows

House of gloom

House of haunting

House of doom

Deep in the old south

By daylights dawn

There is an old house

With a well kept lawn

By day the offer cheesy tours

And speak of haunted houses

Madame Flyffadore 

And all nine of her widowing spouses

How shocking and how scandalous

She shows up at half past nine

She loves the afterlife attention

For her its fear based cheese and wine

What she wont tell you

Is where she dare not go

Above the old servant quarters

For there's a sin she knows

We celebrate the rich old folk

And only just now tallied small

But in the larger scheme of things 

Money dragons matter not at all

In infinite shadow the worlds do echo

In worlds where the Black Rook does not provide

There is a haunting legacy

That marks the bleeding bloody class divide

For there are many ghosts there

Outdoors and still inside

For in am unkept afterlife

Infant mortality true power does pecking rights decide

A ghost monster made of babies

Arms and legs and face

It walks inside the carriage house

Keeping their killers in their place

It isnt unresolved trauma

That keeps them from moving on

Its the sings of greed and class neglect

Thats a prison for fucking bastards so put upon

There is a sharpened timer

A clock of guillotines

In this or sny other world

The awful rich ate where this leans

There will be a reckoning

In this life or the next

Happy Halloween to normal folks 

And fucking rich affluenza freaks watch your necks

House of shadows

House of gloom

House of haunting

House of doom

Sunday, September 24, 2023

[Poem] Pull Down The Moon

By Emmit Other
Image by Chelsea J

Thursday, September 21, 2023

Friday, September 15, 2023

[Poem] The Tyranny of the Tea Cozy

 by Emmit Other

Grandma Pancakes ran a tight ship

The whole family minded their Ps and Qs when she was about

Her opinion 

Better be your opinion

Or she would Delores Umbridge the fuck out of you

No one wanted to be



So many ists

Grandma enforced them all

Until it was time to put her in a home

Until she couldnt enforce the will

Beware using the power of the tea cozy

Beware demanding more than your due 

Merely because you can make people want to avoid the word


Next to their name

For the tea cozy is an illusion

Not real togetherness

Not real love

Not even real power

No one wants to be bullied 

And they wont be

They wont be

Time keeps on ticking

Tick tock

Tick tock


[Poem] The Bitterest Boon of the Oppressor

 by Emmit Other

The United State of America

Is Not

By Any stretch of the imagination

But aside from Satanic Red 

vs Cacaphony Blue

Its Dick Cocaine Rich

va Everyone else

And as history teaches us

The oppressed becomes the oppressor

First chance it gets

So we so see 

When largest oppressed Identity

Poor stupid rural gullible white people

Elected a mother fucking monster

The oppressor does not need to spend every waking moment

Worrying about the police

Or getting pregant

Or raped

Or fired

Or getting a house

But worst of all

The oppressor always has the luxury

Of learning empathy

And the plight of the oppressed

The oppressed have some empaths

Just like it has lazy mother fuckers

Who grab anything and everything

The first chance the boot is on the other foot

Can and will

Which is a recipe for disaster

Because the system is failing

And the Dick Cocaine Rich

Will fall


Not if.

And after that

If intersectionality is thrown out

Then its civil war

And that sounds logical

But a chain is only as strong

As its weakest link

And I observe

Some identities 


And give NOTHING

Not all

But enough

That its clearly a ticking clock

And empowers the largest Oppressed group

Stupid gullible uneducated poor white people

To concede nothing

To give nothing

They wouldnt

And if the Confederation of Identities cant be generous

With each other

Why should they

And they wont

The third fourth fifth and six largest Identities

Would do well to remember that

 Before making demands

Of the seventh eighth ninth and tenth

Thursday, September 14, 2023

[Poem] The Painful Truth of the Desert Red

by Emmit Other

Derpy the Empath had suffered a lot from Snakes
She had followed one after the other
Feeling their deep truths
And she had been a sucker for them each and every time
Thus it was by pain,
Not choice that she embraced truth
Questioning her choices to make sure
That she wasnt dancing to the tune
Of another satanic piper
First there was reading
Libraries worth
Philosophers and Poets
Playwrites and Kings
All opened their secrets to her
And then she found the cause most just
She bled for it
Only to find that her fellow empaths turned on her
Weaponized by a Snake rising through the ranks
Cynical and scarred she fled
And wandered the Earth in a sailing ship
Enjoying the quiet things of life
Decades passed
And she helped from time to time
She was an empath
It was her curse and blessing to feel the pain of others
And she helped them
Even though now she knew
People were glorified Pachinko machines
Respondents to stimulus of culture and need and want
Easy prey for manipulation by snakes
Until she came to a desert port
And heard of a scholar
Who knew Deep Truth
Some said he was a prophet
So she bought a camel
And into the desert she went
And got lost
And lost and lost again
But eventually found a cave
With a solar roof
And a TV and a lifetime supply of DVDs
And he was watching cartoons
She approached the Prophet
And asked
"Are you the Scholar of Truth?"
"Some so say." He replied.
"And what is Deep Truth."
He remained silent.
He watched his show.
She was cautious but waited.
Eventually, he pointed to a mirror.
She went to it
And looked deep into herself
Was a reflection of truth
What she hoped to find?
Two days and two nights
She watched the mirror
And learned much
Thinking in desert silence
While the scholar
Watched a Doctor Who Marathon
Finally, in a starlit night she smiled,
"Thank you scholar, for teaching me."
"I havent taught you shit."
"What?" She was confused.
"I just wanted to see
If you were willing to learn.
The first truth about truth
Is that unless people learn it themselves
Earn it themselves
They will never take valuable truths given them
People are 
Motherfucking Stupid
Dont try to change them
Or pretend something else"
She pondered this, 
And listened but nodded.
"Thats it."
"WHAT?" she was angry.
"Good.  You should be angry."
He waited
And she thought about it
The world was full of evil
Snakes on Snakes
Snakes on Sheep
Sheep turning against the very protectors
Who tried to warn them
Why would anyone
Give a fuck?
Warriors arent Empaths
They can protect
But when Sheep turn to cancer
Fuck that
Fuck the sheep
Dont waste your time
Move on.
And watch some television.

[Poem] The Ballad of the Edgelord's Fury

 By Emmit Other

The Edgelord brooded in his chair most dark

The lights were dim and the room was stark

He simmered and seethed silently

And bid you reader his wofeful take now to hark

"They were mean mean meanies

Who said I shouldnt put duct tape

On the mouths of orphans and puppies 

And kittens

No one is more oppressed than the edgelord

Do they not see how we few suffer

We the male technofascist elite 

Live more suffer more sigh more Love more

In a single day than the none male technoelite

Do in an entire life time?

We go to the edge for life is suffering

And we suffer for the fools who see not our greatness

Anyone who calls us an edgelord

Is a bigot

And a racist

And a jerk

And an edgelord."

Tuesday, September 12, 2023

[Poem] The Lickers of Toilets

 by Emmit Other

You can smell it on their breath

Their accomodation with evil

And embrace of dark death

Apologists for Prince Polonium

Babble onwards ere ad nauseum

Now they will chorus the devils due

Every word that passes his lips cold blue

Shreiks to any learned ears most untrue

From the Crypt Thing on the wrong side mausoleum

Babbling Stalin Clone wont leave well alone

And lies that his beloved Soviet Empire must atone

From dark tank days of Hungary in days past

He says the west now does the same thing 

The harpy dirty bird shit bird poopist does sing

Of how the west is wrong and up is down

But to the shitBRICS global south 

Most any foppish dingleberry can leave the undeads mouth

And they the loser chorus will recite it true

As if their imperialist heads were filled with glue

The Global South just wants things to be new

And by new they mean the boot on the other foot.

No morals do these apologists have

Just an ethical lapse cut by half

To imply that victims of imperialism get to burn

The world that to them was not fair

And yet the deal isnt square 

Because their babbling goo the West doth spurn

So then cries of racism and classism doth the pravda crowd poo

They lick the Prince's toilet bowl

And shovel more bullshit coal

In the engine thats been broken down undue

Monday, September 11, 2023

[Poem] Webcraft

 by Emmit Other

What if

Dear reader

There is a species of spider unknown to man

Who conceals itself in the body of an insect

As it bides its time

To eat the Spider that tries to eat it

A spider Orca

That hunts and eats 

The weavers of webs

The teller of tales

That hunts the halls of truth 

That hunts the halls of story

Becoming the web itself

To seek out its prey and coopt the story

By reading it

By being it

By changing perception

Where perception cannot be changes

Hunts the Orca

Hunts the Spider


And the same

Saturday, September 9, 2023

[Poem] LLMs Are Theft

 by Emmit Other

Z Liberary 

Is where copyright goes to die

And while copyright is too long

Language Learning Models 


Trained on Z library

Are theft



Cheeto munching tech bros

Desperate to get ERP from fake women

Because real ones cant stand the smell

Defend their theft saying

That its just like training someone at the library


A STOLEN library

And proof is in the pudding


Agreed to defend anyone sued for theft


Big Tech doesnt give money for free

Like Demons from hell

Dealing with them always costs you something

These are technofascist libertarian swine

Whose mantra is literally Tanstadfl

Their Aint No Such Thing As a Free Lunch

Never trust Big Tech 

Never trust Tech Bros

Tuesday, September 5, 2023

[Poem] The Curse

 By Emmit Other

Most curses end quickly




When you pick up the blood stained flag of Nazism

When you march around in the jack boots of Hitler

When you heil to the shadow image of the Leader

When you accuse Jews of being anti semetic

The Invisible Powers Hear

Dont blame me, Blame yourself

When you dine with nazis you are a nazi

When you tweet with nazis you are a nazi

You have been warned

Get out

Get out now

For the blood of millions haunts the halls

As the arrogant Leon Stink 

Climbs to the top of Twitter Tower

And pees on the Gods

Saying "At least it cant get any worse

Whats the worst that can happen

Fuck you Karma

I am Elon Musk"

You saw what he did

You know what he did

He is invoking the curse on to himself

Dont be caught in the impact

Sunday, September 3, 2023

[Poem] Three Cities

by Emmit Other

By the night of the moon
And the moon of the night
I weave a tale of hope
And of light
Of good and evil
Of wrong and of right
Three cities have always felt home
The latter was the last to really feel like hone
First Portland
Then Boston
Then Atlanta
But we live our lives 
In the echo of Boston
This is the choice I have made
And I realize now
That this life has been lived three times
Three timelines
Three loops of time
All intertwined on the same life
Views like dreams of diamond on a chain in shadow
Sinking ever deeper into the warm embrace
Of the Queen In Blue
The Lady of Kindness
And The Golden Red
All are real
And all are in my head
All are phantoms
And real shadows
Past the dawn of time
A birth is coming
A ring in shadow
A ring in source
a ring infinity
I choose Atlanta
I choose Boston
I choose Portland
All are real
But only one at once
And here
I am in the center
I am in Boston

Thursday, August 31, 2023

[Poem] The Nexus of Dumb

by Emmit Other

Sometimes two different things
Coming together makes synergy
Something greater than the sum of their parts
Bacon Lettuce and Tomato
Peanut Butter and Chocolate
Niel Gaiman and Terry Pratchet
The Avengers and Justice League
And sometimes
Oh god Sometimes
Two dumb things coming together
Makes things even dumber
Like anti vaxxer murderers
And abusive pet owners
And Freak Parents of Autisitic Kids
Who feel it is something to be cured
Syncing up to prevent
Ladies and gentlemen
In a world of MAGA and Swamp Hitler
And capitalism and Techno Fascism
Climate Deniers and QAnon Freaks
It takes a LOT
like a lot alot
To become the stupidest thing of all time
But Autism for dogs
Preventing dogs from getting autism
From Vaccines
Takes the fucking cake

Wednesday, August 30, 2023

[Poem] Time To Get Up

 by Emmit Other

Time to wake up

The dream is over

Put that magic sword away

Youve gotta make some dough

No not the famous chef kind

Just the daily grind thats slow

Get your coffee

Get your car

Drive to work

Its not that far

Just a two hour commute both ways

Its barely enough 

To make it through both days

Time to wake up

Time to get a grip

Your dreams have ended

The coffee's on french drip

Smell the eggs

Smell the toast

Join the death march coast to coast

From your bed where dreams come true

To work where they go to die




OK there might be hope

But Im not gonna lie

The odds are long like your hours

You are probably gonna die

From a world thats boiling

The sky is on deep fry

Sure you might win the lottery

So flap your arms and try to fly

Odds are you will just look like a fool

But dreams can all come true

Flap your arms and fly away

Since you might be still asleep too

Saturday, August 26, 2023

[Poem] War of the Compass

 by Emmt Other

Global South adds thugs to its gang

Calling out the Globan North

Filthy decendants of imperialists

And even though China is Imperial 

To Tibet Hong Kong and Taiwan

You are really gonna show that Eurotrash

Who can capitalism and kill everyone better

While your number two founding member

Are going full nazi on Ukraine

And like War of the Worlds

Covid is coming back

And the democracy will vaccinate its troops

And the Kleptocracy wont

Mines do nothing against mine sweepers

If not defended w combined arms

Oops you are sick dying or dead

A few taking horse dewormer 

From the black market

Hitch your liittle red wagons

To the dead corpses of two supermen

And see how that turns out for ya slim

See how that turns out for ya

Friday, August 25, 2023

[Poem] Dear Leader

 By Emmit Other

North Korean sci fi

Is an acid trip unto itself

Where the poorest dumbest country in the world

Pulls scientific miracles out their ass

Like the professor on Gilligan's island

Makes magic with the infinite radio and Cocoanuts

They stopped the tidal wave by lassoing the moon

They help Santa by maming his sleigh faster

They feed everyone on Earth with food replicators

Everyone gets a happy Robot butler that takes away their cares

But the one thing  

The only thing

They cant seem to do

Is remove the fat stupid psycho from power

Who has replaced Dear Leader

The all knowing wise one

Who you know

Doesnt even poop

Thursday, August 24, 2023

[Poem] Not Worth It

 By Emmit Other

Even if every delusion of my shadow war were true

And I know for a far they arent

Some are


But the rest?

Not worth it

Not worth the drain and horror

Not worth the lies

Not worth the constant disappointment

Thats life you say

I know

I say

Not worth it


I know what that means

And no

I wont say it

But its simply not worth it for most people

I am better equipped than most to make a difference

On so many levels its not evem funny

I know what to do with power

And I will never have it

Not really

Because I am not willing to be who it takes to seize it

My choice

But watching the world slide i to death despair and destruction

Not worth it

It simply isnt 

Some small gems here and there




But almost




Tuesday, August 22, 2023

[Poem] Lord Frith

 by Emmit Other

Rabbit God of all things

The center if the cycle

An aspect of the all god

That all nature sings

Rabbit prayers 

In the great beyond

Are just as valid

As heard

As yours hungry hunter

But Lord Frith is a harsh God

What is 

Is what must be

There shall be no bargain

And yet

And yet

Sometimes even indifferent Gods

Tilt the odds

They make no bargains

But some creations

Are favored more than others

And yet even if Lagomorphs can have prayers

Think then meat monkey

Your own karmic cosmic sognifcance

You are heard

You are listened to

Out loud

Or in thought

Its a crowded Umbra

Believe it or not

But they believe in you

For good or ill

For good or ill

Saturday, August 19, 2023

[Poem] Formitave Years

 by Emmit Other

Leon Stink made a palace of mirrors

So big and so vast

That people thought it would be

A wonder of the world

The size of nine city blocks

And filled with art treasures from around the world

Amd to say money on the inside

Instead of mirtors

Half of the places for them

Had cardboard cutouts of Leon Stink

For 44 billion dollars

The Nillionare created an empty monument



It was the most 

Leon Stink thing

He could possibly do





Monday, July 31, 2023

[Poem] Back to the Tin Cup

 by Emmit Other

Taking a break

To finish a mighty work

Now they wanna charge

For automated likes

And three people

Who read and like

What I can do here

Every day

For free


The silent spirit botox numbs my face

Firewalls against pure unending chronic depression

Goes to the edge of the cliff

But will not topple

But will not topple

We are all

Stardust and sand

Washing out on the tide

No need to kick my sand castle over early

And charge me to do it

The idea of paying $20 a year

To continue writing my anti capitalist

And technology poetry


A poor choice

Sunday, July 30, 2023

[Poem] Eternal Criminal Empire

 by Emmit Other

The cult is rising

Its tide is sinking

Up is down 

And down is up

Willing evil now blends and blooms

Spreading seeds of death and doom

Those who see those who know

See this recurring thread in history's loom

Pain and fury to bestow

Flare up fire only to self overthrow

Played their hand

Hot and fast

Knowing that

It cannot last

Sell the book

Sell that look

Sell that bleach

That you mistook for a holy cure

Innocent victim so demure

So much you had to self endure

While these woke wussies do concur

About how much you suck

You know that you are just a cuck

Rapidly running out of Hitler luck

Sure do sure do to be you suck

Thinking now your speed is stuck

In your mind you can go 

[Poem] Alito Can Spel Gud

 by Emmit Other

Sew lette mei gett tthys str8

Ah Judj aun teh Sewpryme Corte

Whou Iz Inn Charrge Uf 

Decydin iff saumthin iz 


Or knot

Has knot red

The Constapation?

Itt sayz rite they're inn Article Tree

"Congress Shall Regulamalte Teh Courtz"

I guess when you bang your head

On the floor as hard as you can

For god and country

Until you see stars as a child

You get stupid enough to think

That you can be an originalist

When you dont even know

What the Founding fathers said did or meant

Sounds about Reich

Sounds about Reich

If a Conservative Is Speaking

A Conservative Is Lion

Wednesday, July 26, 2023

[Poem] Gonna Find Out

 by Emmit Other

Pay attention Magalos

Harken and hear

As best you can

With your head up your rear

The Right Wing Likud

You hold so dear

Just made checks and balances

Totes Disappear

To any non conservative

Its now totally clear

Bibi means to illiberalize his nation

Just like you wanna do right here

Fuck around and find out

Fuck around and find out

Fuck around and find out

What the left is about

Magalos love to hump their little guns

When they see dead minorities

Their eyes smile like suns

They get horny at cop violence

Even when it makes no sense

But in Israel every citizen helps

In her defense

So liberals there can shoot

Already now with just one law

They are in the streets to protest

The right wing parties tell the cops to kill

To beat them and make them arrest

So watch what happens when they further right

And force the Israeli left to fight

Watch the magalos pale at the sight

Of Israeli left wing resistance

Masadan soldiers are not just likud

But the entire spectrum of freedoms brood

This isnt over just because some dude

Thinks he owns the law.

Tuesday, July 25, 2023

[Poem] Say Goodbye To Normal

 by Emmit Other

The very doors

Say goodbye to what you knew

Nature is done

Playing nice with you

The coming crisis 

Has now come due

They told you

And told you

And told you

And told you

They told you

And told you

And told you

And told you

For decades you knew

For decades you knew

And now the bill has at last come due

No more snowball fights

No more beach days

No more cheap fruit from all over the world

No more flying places for vacation

No more blue skies

No more nature documentaries

Half the fish dishes you like will go away

Your home more likely to burn

Or be blown to bits in a tornado

Enjoy the intermission

Between now when anyone not a conservative freak

Sees the handwriting  on the wall

Take note 

Take note good citizen

Of which dems vote for what in days to come

Enjoy the intermission 

Between now

And when two major cities are destroyed

Not one

But two

By two witnesses shall the panic set in

The global economies collapse

The internet be restricted to save on energy

Gas cars outlawed

Flights outlawed

Gas powered lawn mowers outlawed

Normal is no longer an option

Your choices are the Hard Way

Or Death


Many many many

Will choose death first

Saturday, July 22, 2023

[Poem] Boiled Frog Pops the Boiler

 by Emmit Other

I read today

That Ghoulgul failed

They are now 

Irredeemably evil

Mandating DRM in Chrome or Chromium

Meaning obnoxious unblockable pop ups

In every website 

And almost every browser

And I am also 

In Minuteman Park

Where a bunch of Colonists


Fuck you Britain

And swarmed like ants

Against the supposedly most powerful army in the World

This is America

And Ghoulgul offering things for free

Trying to steal the internet

Like Gollum snuck in the night

Are about to learn

What happens to a Monopoly

When you fuck with the Internet

Pop pop motherfuckers

Friday, July 21, 2023

[Poem] Nazi Rap

 by Emmit Other

Sloth Toe Barbie

Really really stupid

Shovels herself in the face

Like a demonic cupid

Wants to control

Your uterus

So stupid and so ugly

She got run over by a bus

Take your uncle tom

And get outta here

The nazis are all about

Hate and fear

Thursday, July 20, 2023

[Poem] 3650 Days

 by Emmit Other

An ignorant buffoon

Found a diamond in the rough

And managed to bamboozle her

Into putting up

With an obnoxious blowhard bag of hair

And lo and behold

10 years later

She is still buying into the con

It was the best of times

It was the worst of times

But together 

It was always better

Than alone

The north star of her grace

Made the world worth it

Despite its implicit desire

To fall apart at the seams

Here's to the long con

Here's to the long con

I love you

Captain Fruitloop


Sexy Librarian

Lets try


10 More

Wednesday, July 19, 2023

[Poem] Try that in a Large Town

 by Emmit Other

Nasty little racist twit

Sings a song that gets everyone upset

About how nasty people in small towns

Supposedly were

Cant say our experience

In the small town of Greenfield

Disabused us

Of the notion

But try lyching someone

In a large town


If the Murdercops

Didnt live in small towns

And commute to big ones

Carrying their small town murder ways

Large towns would be even better

Small town folk

Move to big towns

And have kids

Who only care about property



And elect cop humper mayors

But people are getting wise

To how racist



Conservatism is

Keep it in the small towns

Friday, July 14, 2023

[Poem] Is Dick Durbin A Racist?

 by Emmit Other

No one in the democratic party

Has gone full Woodrow Wilson

In a Generation

But how would we feel

About Dems wearing hoods

Or posing with David Duke?

The end of their career

And yet Centrist Freak

Senator Dick Dustbin

Is keeping a racist filth policy alive

Created to keep white judges

In White southern districts

After Brown V Education


The American Reich

Suspends this tradition

That Senator Dustbin 

Glorious works to preserve

So which is it

Is he a moron

Or a racist?

Thursday, July 13, 2023

[Poem] Self Prophesy

 by Emmit Other

How desperate

Could the utterly pathetic

And utterly predictable

Leon Stink

Who is getting his ass handed to him

In Social Media

By Zuckerfucker

To scan Simpsons Episodes

And pretend to fulfill a prophesy

By literally actually fulfilling one?

Sooner or later

The truth would out

But since when

Has something like that

Ever actually stopped

Leon Stink?

Wednesday, July 12, 2023

[Poem] Self Abusing Tech Bro

 by Emmit Other

It is a violation of basic human rights

And basic human decency

To steal the work of artists and writers

For their little llm abominations

But the basement dwelling tech bros

Werent done

They take the vocal performances

Of video game actors

And demand to be able to use AI

To change their voice

To do porn

Of course

If we took the same tech bro

And used their voice

To make homoerotic porn

And instructional videos

For women's rights

The same freak loser conservative tech bros

That feel they can solve world hunger

On a spreadsheet

Because they can code

Would shriek like someone kicked them in the nuts

Tech bros 

Cannot be allowed

To control tech

And the US

Needs a new constitution

That includes dignity as a human right

Fuck Big Tech

[Poem] Self Slavery

  by Emmit Other

Bad enough that Europe is returning 

Like a dog to its vomit

To conservatism

And not to moldy toe jam

Center Reich conservatism

But Qanon maga nazi freak far reich satanism

Even after seeing the UK 

Even after seeing Trump

To vote conservative

In a system that allows third parties

Is the single greatest sign of moral 

And cognitive decline


But to vote that way

When they promise to repeal abortion laws

When they want to make you a brood mare

That is a level of self loathing

That means

You arent worth

The slightest shred or molecule

Of empathy


Or dignity of any kind