[Play] A Hand Grenade Loose in King Arthur's Court - Act 2, Scene 10

 Scene 10

Merlin sits talking with Merlin in one side of the stage (ideally the left) and Morgana sits talking with Morgana (ideally the Right)

[Suggestion: This may be accomplished either with an actor in an identical costume, multi media or possibly a puppet]

Chaos (Off Stage)

Let the betraying champion engage in an endless lecture with himself and create a dissertation on exactly Why a Raven is in fact like a Writing Desk in 5 million words or less with APA Formatting and accompanying bibliography.  They may leave when done.  They will live here as long as it takes, even if the stars burn out.

Merlin

No, no, no that doesnt make any sense.  The taxonomy of a writing desk is vegetable, the taxonomy of a raven is animal.  This is fundamental

Merlin

Well we can both agree they are composed of matter.

Merlin

Yes, but thats all we agree on.  We’ve been here for days and only have one sentence.

Merlin

Well thats not MY fault, you’re the one who won’t be flexible.

Merlin

I am LITERALLY you.

Merlin

Now you’re being pedantic. 

(Both scream in torture)

Order (Off Stage)

Let the betraying champion engage in the traditional torture of the other.  From sun up to sun down, she shall torture her other.  Then the other shall switch places and go from sun down to sun up.  This shall proceed until one relents and dies.  They shall live until this is accomplished even should the stars burn out.

Morgana

Stop, please stop.

Morgana 

You know I literally can’t not torture you.

Morgana

Just a break.  Just five minutes, please, it never stops.

Morgana

All you have to do is let me be the one who lives.

Morgana

No!

(Both scream in rage)

The Lights Go Out

Grenademan Enters

The Lights Go On

Grenademan

OH THAT ACTUALLY IS COOL.  I CAN SEE WHY YOU DO IT.

Morgana

What? How did you get here?

Grenademan

I REVERSED THE POLARITY ON THE OBELISK USING AN OSCILATING QUANTUM MAGNETIC FROMBOTIZER BOUNCING OFF A DEFLECTOR DISH I MADE OF WHEAT AND TINFOIL TRIANGULATED FROM THE MOONS REFLECTION.

Morgana

(beam) I am absolutely sorry I asked.  WHY are you here?

Grenademan

I AM HERE TO RESCUE YOU.

Morgana

Seriously? ME? You?!

Merlin

Hear him out, he has the Golden Helm of Mambrino.  Its probably how he actually got here.  He BELIEVED he could.  If he believes he can free us, then he likely can.

Morgana

We’re already in enough trouble with Order and Chaos.

Merlin

You dont know them well do you? If we can get out of this, they wont care?

Morgana

Hello? Aren’t you supposed to be torturing me?

Morgana

Right.  Sorry.

Grenademan

STOP. DONT DO THAT TO YOURSELF.

Morgana

I literally dont have any other choice.

Grenademan

WHAT DO YOU MEAN?

Morgana

I have to, or I cease to be.

Morgana

And then its my turn.

Grenademan

BUT YOU ARE BOTH YOU?

Morgana

Yes, brilliant this one is.

Grenademan

WELL WHY DOESNT ONE OF YOU JUST CHOOSE TO LET THE OTHER LIVE?

Morgana

Its not that simple.

Morgana

We’re both me.

Grenademan

DO YOU REALLY HATE YOURSELF THAT MUCH?

Morgana

What?  No.

Morgana

Not at all.

Morgana

(beat) Do we hate ourselves that much?

Morgana

Shit.  We do.

Morgana

But we dont have any REASON to.  We’re not that good a person.

Morgana

Why didnt we think of this before?

Morgana

I guess we were too wrapped up in ourselves

Morgana

Fuck them.  Fuck them all.

Morgana

You go.  I’ll end.

Morgana

No, you go.

Merlin

Either of you.  Just pick one.

Morgana

I’ll do it.

Morgana

OK.  I wont forget you Morgana

Morgana

You’d better not.

(Morgana vanishes)

Morgana 

Thank you Grenademan.  Let’s go.

Merlin

Take me with you.

Merlin

Oh no, and leave me to finish five million words? If I’m staying you’re staying with me.

Merlin

Grenademan, can you invent a typewriter that will produce five million words?

Grenademan

OF COURSE.  WE JUST NEED SEVERAL MONKEYS, A COCONUT AND-

Morgana

You helped me.  Let me help you.  He’s not worth it.

Grenademan

WHAT YOU MEAN?

Morgana

Seriously? He’s TOTALLY evil.

Merlin

I’m not that evil.

Merlin

No, she’s right we’re pretty evil.

Grenademan

BUT IT REALLY WOULDNT TAKE THAT LONG ONCE WE FOUND THE MONKEYS.

Morgana

Oh for….Grenademan take my hand.

Grenademan

OK.  (holds her hand) WHY?

Morgana

See ya Merlin.

Merlin

Oh fuck.

(Lights go out)

Grenademan and Morgana leave.

(Lights come back on)

Merlins

Fuck. Fuckfuckfuck.

There are Other Blogs Than These

 I'm only just starting to look at them again but for my five really hard core fans, here are other blogs I've maintained

My Character Blog: Let Me Tell You About My Character

My Political Blog: Eagle As Phoenix

My Opinion/Review Blog: I Have an Opinion of Almost Everything

My Poetry Blog: Codex Americana (This was salvaged from Livejournal with some added poems before I moved to Poetizer)

My Old Family Blog: Shards of a Broken Soul

My New Family Blog: Shards of a United Soul

My Meme Blog: Memes of my Father

Swamp Castle - Savior Unto the Last Generation

A set of aliens want to say hello to Earth but our media of aliens scares the crap out of them.  So, in a near future dystopia they create a child to be raised by a caregiver posing as humans with amazing abilities that also fights weekly generated monsters.  Things go awry when the child begins to go after other evils besides the monsters however....

Check out this episode!

Poem-Half a Hundred Years

Check out this episode!

[Poem] Half a Hundred Years

 by Emmit Other

So fifty times

I have gone around on this Merry Go Round

Astronauts first bounced on the moon

The Vietnam War was still happening

Actual Hippies hadnt traded their values

Still walked the Earth

Before they sold out and bought Mcmanshions

No cellphones

No Wed

Not a Single Luxury

As Prinitive As Can Be

Gilligan was Still Trapped On the Island

All the Beatles were Alive

Nixon got caught

And congress was compotent enough to not let him get away with it

Before Fox News

Before CNN

Before Facebook

Before Microsoft

Before Reusabke Rockets

Before Game of Thrones

Before the Dresden Files

Before Global Warming

Before Equal Rights for Women

Before Stereotypes that are insanely offensive finally started getting corrected

Before the fall of the Berlin Wall

Before the Towers fell

I AM an old man

But I am young at heart

And more than capable of making mischief

Ams setting things on metaphorical fire

And unlike many

I have changed with the times

And look to tomorrow

And believe in the generation of tomorrow

And our responsibility to tomorrow

To agree with the Song

I believe in Yesterday

But I also Believe in Today

And I most believe in tomorrow

And Tomorrow

And Tomorrow

And Tomorrow

[Play] A Hand Grenade Loose in King Arthur's Court - Act 2, Scene 9

 Scene 9

Herald One and Herald Two come on stage

Herald One

All throughout the land, people began to remember the thousands of lives they had lived before.

Herald Two

Lives lost and loves won.

Herald One

Skills gained and promises kept

Herald Two

Wisdom earned and secrets unlocked

Herald One

And so it was that Camelot aged that day

Herald Two

And thus the earned wisdom gained them a martial hand

Herald One

Its true.  Even the lowlist field remembered the last battle fought before the loop was run, a thousand thousand times

Herald Two

Mordreds forces, already harried by Grenademan’s insane devices, became routed

Herald One

And there was much weary rejoining.

Herald Two

And much bittersweet sadness, for all were resolved that this would be the last life they would live

Herald One

And so it was that many lives were changed that day.  Not all, of course.  Some were perfectly content as they were and always had been and always would be.

Herald Two

Never underestimate the capacity of a fool to be such.

Herald One

But for more

Herald Two

For most

Herald One

They awakened in them something new.  Thus the golden age of the West, its time of innocence, the foundation of half the nations of Europe and those that became imprinted on that culture as an ideal, became something more.  Much more.

Herald Two

A golden age of philosophy, science, art, literature, justice, and good governance.  There were still wars and plagues and calumnies but for some

Herald One

Some

Herald Two

There spread in the root of time on many earths a golden age that changed them for the better, and the game board became a foundation of democracy; the worlds changed, the stories changed, and when it was understood that Good does not need to end in tragedy or the unobtainable, betrayal and dust, they changed their thinking

Herald One

Wolves of the pack; to be proactive and fierce in protecting their liberty and freedoms, but protecting their own and nurturing the good of all for their own self interest.

Herald Two

Frank Noble, AKA Grenademan, had undone the curse they did not even know they were under.

Herald One

But his work was not done yet.

Herald Two

One more act for the hero to perform.

Scene 9

Herald One and Herald Two come on stage

Herald One

All throughout the land, people began to remember the thousands of lives they had lived before.

Herald Two

Lives lost and loves won.

Herald One

Skills gained and promises kept

Herald Two

Wisdom earned and secrets unlocked

Herald One

And so it was that Camelot aged that day

Herald Two

And thus the earned wisdom gained them a martial hand

Herald One

Its true.  Even the lowlist field remembered the last battle fought before the loop was run, a thousand thousand times

Herald Two

Mordreds forces, already harried by Grenademan’s insane devices, became routed

Herald One

And there was much weary rejoining.

Herald Two

And much bittersweet sadness, for all were resolved that this would be the last life they would live

Herald One

And so it was that many lives were changed that day.  Not all, of course.  Some were perfectly content as they were and always had been and always would be.

Herald Two

Never underestimate the capacity of a fool to be such.

Herald One

But for more

Herald Two

For most

Herald One

They awakened in them something new.  Thus the golden age of the West, its time of innocence, the foundation of half the nations of Europe and those that became imprinted on that culture as an ideal, became something more.  Much more.

Herald Two

A golden age of philosophy, science, art, literature, justice, and good governance.  There were still wars and plagues and calumnies but for some

Herald One

Some

Herald Two

There spread in the root of time on many earths a golden age that changed them for the better, and the game board became a foundation of democracy; the worlds changed, the stories changed, and when it was understood that Good does not need to end in tragedy or the unobtainable, betrayal and dust, they changed their thinking

Herald One

Wolves of the pack; to be proactive and fierce in protecting their liberty and freedoms, but protecting their own and nurturing the good of all for their own self interest.

Herald Two

Frank Noble, AKA Grenademan, had undone the curse they did not even know they were under.

Herald One

But his work was not done yet.

Herald Two

One more act for the hero to perform.

[Play] A Hand Grenade Loose in King Arthur's Court - Act 2, Scene 8

 Scene 8

Arthur, Pelinor, Lancelot and Grenademan are in the throne room, with Arthur in his throne, his knights by his side and Grenademan in front of them.

Arthur

So you can see how this looks, Sir Grenademan?

Grenademan

I DO KING ARTHUR.  I WAS ABSTRACTLY AWARE OF THE TALES OF WHAT MORGAN HAD DONE BUT NOT THE SPECIFICS OF HER VILLANY HERE.

Arthur

I will never understand this business of my life being a story elsewhere, but I trust your honor enough to accept it.  The bibble spilled by Morgana seems to back that up.  But what specifically happened when you went with her?

Grenademan

WE TRAVELED TO AN OBELISK AND I BLEW IT UP.

Pelinor

Can you describe this Obelisk?

Grenademan

IT WAS A BLACK OBELISK WITH WRITING ON IT.

Pelinor

And what happened when you made it a former Obelisk?

Grenademan

OBERON WAS LESS THAN PLEASED AND TOOK MORGANA AND MERLIN FOR PUNISHMENT.

Pelinor

I see.  I do not claim to know much of the Fae but this is most troubling.

Arthur

So this was supposed to somehow free us from the cycle of usage by these two beings?

Grenademan

THAT IS CORRECT.

Lancelot

That might be the source of these strange dreams I’m having.

Pelinor

Like what?

Lancelot

Where I fell in love with an ice skater.

Pelinor 

I had that dream

Arthur

What is an ice skater?

Lancelot

Did you have the one about the Taxidermist?

Pelinor

I did! He was amazing

Arthur

What is a Taxidermist?

Lancelot

This would explain the strange dreams that people have been having all over the kingdom

Pelinor

We must put out word immediately and start to write these down so that our memories aren’t lost again.

Arthur

WHAT memories?

Grenademan

THE MEMORIES YOU LOST EACH TIME ORDER AND CHAOS RESET THE LOOP

Arthur

Oh.  (beat) Well then, let it be done!  While we still have time.

(Pelinor and Lancelot speed off)