[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Snowbell

People think cats are indifferent to their humans

But its a careful lie

They dont want us getting too arrogant

They dimply teach us what they perceive as divine eisdom

So when Snowbell

Got scared at the gas station

And ran out

The family was 500 miles away

Before panic set in

Snowbell was invisible in the snow

And cold

And terrified

Looking for her family

A week passed

And she was placed in a shelter

The clock was ticking

All seemed lost

When a bat came through the skylight

And talked to them

Every single one got a home

Snowbell was last

The hardest to find

And late on Christmas eve

A doorbell was rung

And as the snow fell

A grateful family embraced

 their long lost owner 

Only Snowbell heard the flapping of batwings

And reindeer hooves

Up in the sky

Up in the deep whir sky

[Poem] The First God of Christmas

by Emmit Other

The God of Christmas

Isnt Who You think

Amd every present 

That you wrap

Gives him a sippy drink

Who you ask?

Quite a simple task

Old ringed Saturn

God of Time

Takes your spirit most sublime

And sips it in like fine fine wine

So go be merry

Get to work

Insane shopping 

So he takes a schlurk

Oh so jolly

The saint that aint

Giveth presents

Like a thing that aint

Eyes aglow

Inside the fire

Milk and Cookies 

His hungry desire

Takes your offering

And leaves a present

You think you gave it

Isnt that pleasant

No burden of worship

The rest of the year

You steal his holiday

He steals right back and wont shed a tear.

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Slarg's Christmas Wish

The nicest werewolf

With a  rage of 10 you ever met

Too stupid to be mean

This Ahroun Shadowlord stereotype

Thinks it is a genetically modified dog

Who works for Jeebers Mcjosephat 

The second most powerful vampire in Oklahoma

Templated personality wise

More on the Tasmanian Devil 

Than perfect hair at Trader Vik's

He found the taste of elves

To minty fresh

4 out of 5 dentists who chew screaming elves

Recommend Dentine to clean out the gums

Merry Christmas Slarg

Merry Christmas

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[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Pericuolo Narr

An anarch vampire turned just prior to the Treaty of Thorns

He fought with the underdog and against Empire

Against small evil for centuries

Always on the side of Liberty

He spotted a zip tied Santa 

And cut him free with a rip of Gangrel claws

But they still had Santas magic bag

Distributing bags of blood

To all the naughty Sabbat vampires

So he took this new fangled Hot Air Balloon

And poured gallons of whale oil on the barn

And lit the  match

And enjoyed a nice toasty Christmas bonfire

While a horrified Santa looks on

Peri always got to pick on house 

That Santa visited every Christmas without fail

Worthy or not, believing or not

So far he has 'Saved Christmas' 237 times

And he intende

To do it 237 more.

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Gimpl Santa

If a magical being is affected by our portrayal

Like statues making Zeus

Then think of the number of times

Santa has been kidnapped

Restrained

Zip Tied

Hey baby

He likes it

Hes into that

Every December 26th

He gets down With Mrs Clause

In a Rabbet Suit

The eleves all join in

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Out Of Their League

The League of Christmas Darkness were evil but not bad

So when they saw the North Pole sink 

They hung their heads in sad

With no Santa  there was no ritual to steal

With all drowned elves

Some monsters had no meal

Sure they could survive

But  they defined themselves with Christmas

And while genuinely good people

Were still good

The lack of magic without Drowned Santa

Was random and rare

And so Mirror Universe Santa, and Krampus 

And all the other Christmas Villains

Began to believe presents again

Coopted by the Holiday 

That Would Not Stop

Could Not Be Stopped

Until

You

Are

Fucking 

Merry.

[Poem] 31 Carols of Christmas - Borealisg

The Northern Lights inspires

But she is eternally alone

She lights the sky

And brings hope to those in the Long Winter Night

She cannot see her peer

Far far to the south

But she can hear her

They sing at night

Songs only the stars can hear

Until fon one night

A magic spell

Let them embrace in each others arms

Two dancing lovers

Kissing and twirling in the snow

Together at last